queenieofaces:

Do you run an ace advice blog?  Do you frequently answer asks about asexuality?  Then you should probably read the below posts so you know how to sensitively answer some frequently asked questions about asexuality.  (Or you could read them because they’re interesting and being well-informed is generally a good idea!)

If someone asks you whether they’re asexual/how they should identify:

Sciatrix on why labeling people is a terrible idea

nextstepcake on how to answer these sorts of asks

If someone under the age of 18 asks whether they’re asexual:

Teen aces and the “you might not be asexual forever” disclaimer by me (here on The Asexual Agenda)

The average age of first sexual attraction is ten

Critique of Popular Reason on having their asexuality dismissed as a teenager

This entire Carnival of Aces was on teenagers, and this one was on age/ageism.

If someone asks about sex-repulsion/says they don’t want to have sex:

bessibels on why you should not pressure aces into having sex with their partners

Your Sex-Normative Ideas Ain’t News by The Ace Theist

beranyth on why you should not tell aces who have feeling guilty about not having sex that “it’s okay for asexuals to have sex”

I wrote up some ways that sex-repulsed/sex-averse aces are stigmatized in ace communities (here on The Asexual Agenda)

Here’s a linkspam on sex-aversion/sex-repulsion, and here’s a whole Carnival of Aces on sex-repulsion/sex-aversion.

If anyone asks about hormonal imbalances/medical issues/mental illness/autism causing asexuality:

ace-muslim on “Why don’t you get your hormones checked?”

anotherspoonie on asexuality and hip dysplasia

nightengalesnkd on the intersection of asexuality and disability

swankivy on how “asexual” should be a description of what you feel, not why

Here’s a whole Carnival on asexuality and disability, and here’s one on asexuality and autism.

If someone asks anything about asexuality and sexual violence:

Please give survivor-competent ace advice!

Things you can do to make ace spaces more welcoming for aces who have experienced sexual violence

Challenges Faced by Ace Survivors (here on The Asexual Agenda)

I have an entire tag on asexuality and sexual violence, and you should check out resourcesforacesurvivors, especially the #for supporters tag.

If someone has a question about masturbation/orgasms/anatomy:

Asexuality Archive has written an entire series on this!

I want to read a bunch more on asexuality but I haven’t the foggiest where to even start!

Have you considered checking out a linkspam?  Or maybe some of these linkspams?  Perhaps you would enjoy Carnival of Aces, which is conveniently divided up by topic.  Here’s a whole archive of articles on asexuality.  The Asexual Agenda’s blogroll is usually pretty up to date too.

Let’s give sensitive and respectful ace advice, yeah?

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Tags:

#asexuality #there are some interesting things in here #most of them are things I’ve read before #but that particular link for ‘the average age of first sexual attraction is ten’ was new to me #it was a fascinating if somewhat uncomfortable read #yet another declaration of How Sexuality Works that completely fails to account for my existence #(I’m not talking about my asexuality) #(I’m talking about my sexual desires) #(I remember the firsts of puberty) #(the first hairs in various places) #(the moment I realised my breasts were definitely bigger than they had been before) #(the resignation I felt when I first saw blood on my toilet paper) #(but I don’t remember my first sexual fantasy) #(or the first time I felt arousal) #(I don’t remember ever being *surprised* by them) #(my earliest memories regarding them treat them as something that’s always been there) #(I find it mind-boggling that having been old enough to remember a time before is not only a thing but a *common* thing) #(common to the point that the existence of those of us who have always been so is easily missed) #sexuality and lack thereof #tag rambles #Possible TMI