Math prof: …and the foundation of this method is that our function can be split into a base state and perturbation. So alpha is split into beta and epsilon.
Me: *strangled noise*
Math prof: Of course, we can further split epsilon…
Me: *coughing fit*
Tags:
#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #Red vs Blue
So it turns out as a movie it is pretty problematic and shitty but a good 25% of it is Alan Rickman wearing swishy cloaks trancing (or something like it) ladies who realllllyyyyyy seem to enjoy it. But he just keeps whining about healing the world and science and stuff.
This is for science.
And medicine.
Not sexy at all.
SHE WANTS THE T. (T=trance)
Goddamn that little handhold in a hypno context can just be the most intimate thing.
Ugh Hans Gruber Snape Mesmer Rickman stop making me love you.
Not sexual. Nope.
NOTE This character is pretty much moaning at this point. Because getting your blindness treated is hawt.
Prettttttty sure I do something like this in trance.
I guess this could be kinky but she’s already blind.
Like I said, there’s a lotta dis.
AW YEAH GET IT GURL AND BY “IT” I MEAN YOUR VISION AND THERFORE AN EYEFUL OF SEXY HYPNOTIST ALAN RICKMAN.
ALL THE FRENCH ROYAL LADIES WANT THE T.
Same.
Wait I think I saw a porno like this once.
WHAT THE FUCK HE IS MAKING A ROOM FULL OF FRENCH LADIES HAVE AN ORGASM. THIS MOVIE IS NOT EVEN PRETENDING MESMERISM ISN’T SEXUAL. WHAT IS GOING ON. WHY IS THIS MOVIE SHITTY/GREAT?
YOU TOO ALAN?
GREATEST.
MOVIE.
SCENE.
EVER.
In conclusion: Thank you, Dr. Mesmer. You hoped your work would cure suffering and disease, and eventually your legacy resulted in freaks like me getting off on it. And you got a shitty biopic that was kinda hot in a weird way, even by hypnofetishist standards. Mazel tov.
Also, Alan Rickman can get it.
SWAG
You hoped your work would cure suffering and disease, and eventually your legacy resulted in freaks like me getting off on it.
To be fair, this was totally a thing at the time. Consider, for instance, this extended quote regarding the morality of “animal magnetism”. which is basically a bunch of medical commissioners being extremely suspicious of how much resemblance hypnosis bears to sex. I think there might be other choice quotes in that book, too, but that was the easiest one to find.
(The book’s an interesting read, regardless. The late-1700′s conception of hypnosis described in the historical sections is pretty much unrecognisable from a turn-of-the-millennium point of view (my turn-of-the-millennium point of view, anyway), and even the “modern-day” (1890′s) sections are very different.)
Tags:
#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #(‘Hans Gruber Snape Mesmer Rickman’) #reply via reblog #sexuality and lack thereof #though I actually don’t really find mesmerism hot #for pretty much *exactly* the same reasons that contemporaries *did* find it hot #orgasms are so not my style #too stimulating #not restful enough #I suppose this probably counts as #nsfw #oh and also #long post
Cryptid theory: Bigfoots don’t sexually reproduce; rather, they’re derived from Bigfoot hunters who go too deep and undergo the necessary metamorphosis into a Bigfoot, attracting new Bigfoot hunters in turn as part of a sinister cycle of transformation and reproduction.
A small dedication to Sir Terry Pratchett. A man who brought a little more magic to the world and left behind a legacy. I know that his fans will keep his imaginative spirit alive for years to come. Here is my little contribution.
Tags:
#Discworld #GNU Terry Pratchett #I get the impression the wizard books aren’t as well-liked #but I like Rincewind #it’s refreshing to see a cowardly character who isn’t villainised for it
Ursula: I HAVE to give them a five, and again, as with the Chips Ahoy Root Beer and other things, this is a completely unnatural food made with alchemy. This is not food, this is extremely artificial, but it is EXACTLY what it says it is: it tastes exactly like it. It’s honestly kind of horrifying, but there you are.
Kevin: Really, the fact that it’s completely chemically made is the part that is making me allow it for a five, because those things are fucking delicious. I’d eat that whole bag!
Ursula: It’s like having sex with an android.
Kevin: …What.
Ursula: It’s like having sex with an android! It may be a physically satisfying experience, but it’s not real: there is no human connection…
Kevin: What…?
Ursula: …Fleshlight. Fleshlight’s a better one. It may be a totally sensually accurate experience, but it is still basically unnatural and there’s no love there.
Kevin: …Okay. I… don’t know what to do about that analogy. I mean, I’m tempted to take it out back and shoot it, but I can’t come up with anything better right now. So I’m just going to move on!
Ursula: So, I got yelled at once at a sex toy party! I went with my friend Carlotta, and it was a good friend Laura, who was lovely, and she did, we called them “Fuckerware parties”, where she sold vibrators and whatnot. And the end result was that there was one person in our entire social circle who knew what all of us were into that we would never admit to another soul. And they were basically Tupperware parties, except they were vibrators and whatnot. And she was very honest, I would go be like, “That thing looks interesting”, and she would be like, “Yeah, they’ll fall apart after one use, don’t bother.” …But she did yell at me once. Or rather, she gave me a very stern look. And that was when Adam and Eve (I think it was Adam and Eve who was doing it at the time) had just perfected what amounted to a fake skin texture.
Kevin: Yep.
Ursula: And they were selling dildos and vibrators in the fake skin texture (and this is why we put the adult content warning on this show). And they handing them around, and it FELT like a penis! It had skin, like a penis! This was very similar, but there was something wrong with it. And it was the Uncanny Valley of texture. It was like, it was almost perfect but it failed in some aspect and that failure made it infinitely more creepy than if it had just been, like, hard plastic. So I’m sitting there, next to I believe Carlotta, as we’re staring… Maybe it was Mur? I don’t remember, anyway, someone was with me, and we’re staring at this at this sex toy. And suddenly it hit me: it was room temperature. It wasn’t hot!
Kevin: Hahaha.
Ursula: And because I have NO tact filters, whatsoever…
Kevin: None! You should see the prep before sending her out to do a school presentation. “Don’t say fuck, don’t say fuck, don’t say fuck!”
Ursula: Yes, I spend five minutes in the car going, “Don’t say fuck, don’t say fuck, don’t say fuck!” Anyway, so… I burst out, in… Perhaps more loudly than I should have… “Oh my God, it’s cold! It’s perfect for all your necrophilia fantasies!” …And I got such a Look. I don’t happen to HAVE necrophilia fantasies, which is probably why it was creeping me the hell out. But the point is, if you make something that is absolutely 100% texturally perfect but wrong, it’s wronger than if it just wasn’t perfect. So what I am getting at, is that Red Velvet Oreos are like fucking a fake corpse. …Moving on.
Kevin: ……. I got nothin’.
Tags:
#nsfw #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #I’m quite a bit behind so I haven’t actually listened to this episode yet #but #that’s it that’s the show #(except *sometimes* there’s less sex) #(but yeah this is the show) #Kevin and Ursula Eat Cheap #highly recommended
Brinens and Things 