brin-bellway is a mean vacuum who murders CUTE SOUND BABIES OF CUTENESS because she’s EVIL! She’s almost as murderous as luminousalicorn. She also comes from a country which murdered a CUTE DEMON CORE in order to create a star. Basically, she’s a CUTE THING MURDERER! She’s probably a sofa that eats precious cinnamon rolls, too.
She is also known to hug and feed chocolate bars to cute chicks in tiny hats. This makes the chicks get fat. Like, really fat. brin-bellway is singlehandedly responsible for whale evolution. You didn’t know whales came from fat birbs, did you? Well Science, bitch!
Brin has been known to gossip about people from the distant past. She also stalks and takes pictures of poor, defenseless pollen grains. The pollen grains can’t escape – even across borders. Despite storing dozens of lethal weapons in improbable places, the TSA still thinks that she’s ‘mostly harmless’. That’s right – they call this cuteness-killing stalker harmless. This is the level of incompetence we have come to.
She is a certified Klingon counselor and dude-with-hair in the Silmarillion. She has battled many foes across many fandoms, spreading awful, awful humour in her wake. She’s totally the type of person who would think calling random things degenerate was funny. That’s degenerate.
Calling Random Shit Degenerate: Not Even Once.
Her degeneracy is so extreme that she’s worse than a floral print sofa. She’s a *fainting couch*. A fainting couch for wealthy robot ladies who think too much. She’s the type of couch who wants unambiguous minions of the chaotic efficient variety. They help her beat up the Mean Meanies that scare her Precious Robots.
But that isn’t degenerate enough *either!* We can go *deeper!* Brin is a hypno-fetishist asexual! Yes, asexual fetishist. Life is weird, OK? She wants to have non-sex sex with a pocket watch, or something. I don’t really know. I would educate myself about this, but ozymandias271 has permanently ruined education. Therefore, I will confidently say blatantly ignorant things, like a True Freedom Lover.
Trump 2016.
Follow her blog if you want to faint into a patch cute forget-me-nots, as they get murdered by a vacuum sofa.
Tags:
#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #humour *and* stuff about me! today is a good day #(well okay technically it’s after midnight) #(I need to go to bed) #(also non-sex sex is the *best* kind of sex) #(accept no substitutes)
Brinens and Things 