ducktoothcollection:

eluciferate:

eluciferate:

this pride month I am wishing everyone a very stop overanalyzing yourself and just have fun with it. have gay sex. don’t have any sex. try on a new gender. stop caring about gender at all. talk to your doctor about hormones. go on a date. break up with the person you dont love. whatever it is you have been putting off doing by dithering about it in your head. just do that and fully experience how it feels without trying to put it into words. if you still need a word for it later there will be one. they aren’t going anywhere. but people were here before language and there’s only so far language can go in giving you a fulfilling human experience. so if you are hiding behind finding the right words for whatever it is your heart wants i hope this month you get the courage to just do it instead.

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on the other hand. this guy gets it

[ID: tags reading “ur right I can unclog the shower on my own. Thank you for giving me the courage I need.” End ID.]


Tags:

#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #overly literal interpretations #this probably deserves some warning tag but I am not sure what

seasonallydefective:

vstheworld:

tariqah:

prospt:

prospt:

i cant believe that ‘im such a top i’ve never submitted to anything, ESPECIALLY not stoplights’ is a real canon sentiment expressed by a real canon death note character

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this is, legitimately, one of the funniest fucking things ive seen in my entire life

Los Angeles BB cases were the best

I left this fandom a decade and change ago what the fuck happened in my abscence

Oh my god … I forgot about this 🤣


Tags:

#Death Note #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #this probably deserves some warning tag but I am not sure what

autisticcosima:

my sense of humor: getting birthday cards with the wildly incorrect age on it for people

 

magicoftelevision:

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thebagelhut:

I see this and raise you: getting cards for a wildly different occasion and customizing them to fit the holiday you need

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9cb85d9e942f5491d349925997bdf4a67f559944

 

motherhenna:

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discount-butlins:

ab8e8bd1ce11740d7cab865495fb583594b0d1b8

 

qu3ercus:

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throwback to the time my partner put in his 2 week notice with a birthday card for a 2 year old

 

silly-slacker-person:

King

 

kkshowtunes:

Once I got a card that said “BEST GREAT GRANPA EVER!!”

I’m a teenager

 

unscharf-an-den-raendern:

5971125cde2b002d75b39a0f6193746db8c3228a

Tags:

#juxtaposition #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #(the last one) #this probably deserves some warning tag but I am not sure what #injury cw?

sketiana:

plumlatte:

sketiana:

you spend so much time trying to make yourself more palatable that in the end you taste bland. forgettable

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ba219665c4463d6b7ea22cd7249c5a901441b745

Tags:

#Hannibal #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #cannibalism cw? #this probably deserves some other warning tag but I am not sure what

rozcoe-deactivated20220420:

do kids these days know about little talks by of monsters and men.

#NECESSARY LIFE KNOWLEDGE #shrimp emotions are contained in that song I swear (theearnestonion)


Tags:

#h/t hatethiscar: I saw theearnestonion’s tags in the notes and I needed them #music #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #(people in the notes are waxing lyrical (so to speak) about My Head Is an Animal‚ but you know what’s even better?) #(Beneath the Skin) #(absolutely amazing album) #(almost every track is good and most of them are great) #((I was talking about this on Dreamwidth a while back and *nobody* could agree on what ”We Sink” is about‚ but we agree that it’s great)) #((maybe there’s shrimp emotions in there too)) #(((in semi-related news‚ have you noticed that store radios never play Florence and the Machine anymore?))) #(((it’s weird: I really thought they’d make it into the 50-year rotation)))

mikkeneko:

platypik:

largishcat:

littlebirdofprey:

ive always hated when a vampire story is trying to distance itself from traditional lore or common perception and the vampire turns up their nose and says “and no. I don’t turn into a bat” like they’re so offended that you’d even suggest that they could do something so cool. well congratulations you’re uncool and boring goodbye

“Can you turn into a bat?”

“God, no, I wish,” sighed the vampire. “That’d be fucking badass.”

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#hey it took him a while but he eventually managed it


Tags:

#vampires #Twilight #Batman #juxtaposition #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog

homunculus-argument:

[footage of the inside of an ordinary Eastern-European home, taken with a handheld phone camera, the man filming is walking from the living room to the back door of the house]

man, narrating in russian: Every fucking year, this time of the year, the pond at my backyard gets infested. What do ponds get infested with? Frogs? Poisonous weeds? Geese? No. Not my pond.

[The man opens the back door, stepping out into a garden. Three or four nude, human-like figures dash from the borders of a pond back into the water.]

man: Rusalki! I don’t know where they come from or how they get here, and I can’t afford to hire an exterminator every year. I can’t let my cat outside anymore. Last year a rusalka managed to drown a whole deer in my pond, the stench was unbearable.

[He walks as he speaks, approaching the pond. There are several eerily beautiful female beings peering at him from under the surface, their long hair floating in the murky water. Their eyes are gleaming in an unhuman way. The man holding the camera stops to film them.]

man, calm and deadpan: What the fuck are all of you staring at. Get jobs or something.

[One of the rusalki, smaller than the others and clearly not a fully matured adult, slowly reaches out of the water with her white, thin hand, grasping his ankle. He appears unconcerned.]

man: You can’t drown me, you little idiot. You’re too small. Shoo!

[A loud thud startles the rusalki, making them scatter. A second thud makes it clear these are the approaching footsteps of something massive. The man turns around and points the camera at what appears to be a house, walking past above the treeline with chicken-like legs]

man, now yelling: IF YOUR HOUSE SHITS ON MY YARD AGAIN I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD-

 

typhoidmeri:

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gothiccharmschool:

This post is a joy and a delight.

 

icedsilver:

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deadpanwalking:

this is the energy

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esrah-rah-rasputin:

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Okay I HAD to do this was just perfect

 

justafterjericho:

@neoncl0ckwork​ xD

 

gothiccharmschool:

Oh my G-D the post got better.


Tags:

#storytime #my past self has good taste #it got better #drowning cw #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #mythology