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Anakin: [dramatic and villainous] Join me, Master! I’ll give you one last chance!
Obi-Wan: …fine. 
Anakin: I – [Dramatic John Williams Score cuts out] Wait, what?
Obi-Wan: I said all right, then. [puts his cloak back on]
Anakin: [mouth agape] Wh– no, Master, you – 
Obi-Wan: You offered, didn’t you? I mean if the Jedi Order and Republic are over, as you say, I suppose I’ve got to find employment somewhere
Anakin: [with gears visibly turning in his head] Well – but – it’s just. I’m talking about the Dark Side, Master, you know that, right?
Obi-Wan: Yes. What else could you have possibly been talking about?
Anakin: I…right, of course. So…you’re just, fine with becoming a Sith Lord, just like that. 
Obi-Wan: [smoothing out his sleeves] Hmm? I mean, I suppose, you know. Whatever you want to do. 
Anakin: That…this doesn’t make any sense. 
Obi-Wan: See, those were my thoughts exactly! 
Anakin: [confused as hell] …yeah, so…why…
Obi-Wan: [scrolling on his phone] I, too, thought to myself “goodness! That certainly looks like Anakin pledging his life to a Sith Lord, but that, that makes no sense whatsoever! We were just about to win the war, and at any rate I just saw him only a handful of hours ago. Becoming a Sith, at this moment of all moments, would be possibly the stupidest, least-thought-through decision he’s ever made, even including that time he ate those leftovers that had been in the conservator since before we left for Christophsis.” 
Anakin: [makes a face] 
Obi-Wan: But then I thought, “well, Obi-Wan, you’ve known Anakin a very long time, surely if he’s doing something this drastic, it must be for a very good reason indeed. A reason that is based on solid facts that he has thought through at length after having gotten many hours of restful sleep. It’s not like he’d turn to the Dark Side because he’s panicked about something and refuses to talk to anyone about it in any actionable detail, and has decided to place all his proverbial eggs in one basket that happens to belong to a Sith Lord who orchestrated this entire war from the start!” Because of course that would be idiotic. And if that were the case, Anakin should probably just shut up and get on the ship and go help his wife before I have to do something I very much wouldn’t like to have to do to him. 
Anakin: [opens his mouth] [closes it] [unintelligible mumble]
Obi-Wan: So, very well then. Sith Lords it is. Do I need to do anything immediately, or shall we just get on to murdering people?I I must say I don’t own many dark colors, but I’m sure we can stop at a store at some point during our killing spree. 
Anakin: W– no, I mean, Obi-Wan, you can’t…like…be that way. That’s not…you’re…you.
Obi-Wan: What way is that, Anakin? Did you or did you not ask me to join you? Hmm? I said I accept. I presume you are a man of your word. Whom shall I kill in cold blood? [draws his lightsaber]
Anakin: I…you should. I just. [mumbles again]
Obi-Wan: What’s that? I couldn’t quite hear you. [leans in slightly] Would it bother you to see me behaving in such a way? Would it disappoint you, or possibly even tear your heart into pieces to watch your Master fall so far and do such terrible things? Would you do anything, forgive anything even though that is objectively insane, in the off chance that I might see reason, because I am behaving so far beyond anything you know of me?
Anakin: [looks away and stares] [more mumbling, scuffs his boot on the ground]
Obi-Wan: …well?!
Anakin: [pouting and picking up his cloak, already walking away] I said I’ll get in the ship! 


#Star Wars #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog

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