sinesalvatorem:

Mum: …And then you have to move all the stakes around in the sauce so that the flavour gets distributed evenly.

Me: What’s with this talk of “even distribution”? That’s Communism! Do you want us to get invaded again?

Mum: Yeah, yeah. Just keep turning them. Move the ones on the bottom to the top.

Me: For how long? How long must we indulge these revolutionaries?

Mum: For as long as possible. The ideal would be permanent revolution, but I think 10 minutes should suffice.

Me: *takes an icepick out of the draw and brandishes it* You take that back, you Trotskyite!

Mum: *rolls eyes*

Me: Ugh. Why do I even care if the flavour is evenly distributed?

Mum: Because you never know which piece of meat you’re going to get.

Me: ….That is the sanest argument for economic leftism I’ve heard all year.

Mum: Alison, it’s the second of January.

Me: Well, yeah. It’s just that the leftists were hung over yesterday from celebrating the long-awaited overthrow of 2015.

Tags:

#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #they just materialise #human nature will create its own icepicks

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