I’m going to start it pretty soon. I’m for some reason locked out of my student account and email and IT was no help as usual, so what is there to do except read a parody romance novel written specifically to spite J.K. Rowling?
Chuck Tingle has more or less become a meme because of his bizarre titles and covers and because of the Hugo fiasco, but I’ve heard relatively little about what it’s like to actually read his work and I frankly have no idea what to expect or if I should go into this with expectations at all
This book is…surprisingly easy to take seriously as a book. I don’t know what I’m trying to say. But it’s like. A Book and not just an extended joke. Like on some level it’s not particularly terribly written nor does the plot like, completely exist in service to the…whatever humor is derived from the self-aware absurdity of the premise
I love that he’s not even described as a humanoid dinosaur. He’s just sexy goth tattooed Severus snape and he’s also a parasaurolophus and we are left to just figure it out
I have to talk about what is going on with the worldbuilding. Like this is a parody. Of Harry Potter. But there’s an entirely different magic system and….everything???
In summary
there doesn’t appear to be a statute of secrecy type thing magic is just fully integrated with the modern world and modern technology
Harriet is a wizard, but that means that she creates spells by typing them out in long manuscripts, which on one level is a nod to the book publishing industry but on another level is kind of interesting in of itself
there’s a??? spellcasting industry??
there are different types of magic users other than wizards, and they appear to be based on the d&d classes
or at least, bards exist and they are distinct from wizard
the dinosaur is a bard
Bigfeet exist and they are integrated with modern society
there are sentient motorcycles and no one finds this in any way unusual
As much as I love skillfully crafted satire that takes deft jabs at the flaws of the thing it’s lampooning, there’s also something charming about how every character in this book has a name blatantly and hilariously derived from a Harry Potter character regardless of how most of their roles in the story barely resemble anything like characters in Harry Potter.
…You know, I’m not even sure Chuck Tingle has read Harry Potter.
I’m so sorry to sample the sex scene but. “sexualis secondus” just killed me. I have been pronounced dead by this book. im obliterated this is indescribable
I literally have no idea how to describe what I’m experiencing right now. Like this is a somewhat poorly edited parody adult dinosaur romance novel but. It’s genuinely?? Creative?? In a lot of ways???? And there’s a lot of heart to it, a lot of genuine powerful messages about identity and about art and creativity and the fourth-wall-breaking device is…I can’t explain it because that would spoil it but it’s actually pulled off so well?????
This is not like, a humorous joke story this guy did for Being a Little Shit and Spite reasons, it’s like actually in its themes and message a genuine “fuck you” to j.k. Rowling’s transphobia even though it’s this absolutely wild janky batshit story and I have never experienced anything like this in my LIFE
I did not expect my adhd little heart to be touched by understanding of my fears about creativity and writing and its place in my life. Not like this. What the fuck. What the fuck.
#this has been sitting in my to-reblog for literal months while I struggle to figure out how to tag it #but with @drchucktingle joining Tumblr‚ now seems like a particularly fitting time to dig it out #storytime #fanfic #Harry Potter #Chuck Tingle #nsfw text #this probably deserves some other warning tag but I am not sure what #cissexism cw?
(it’s about a kink caption which is picture of a dude in his underwear talking about ‘slutweed’, which is, ofc, weed that makes you slutty)
two replies:
i found this blog back when this screenshot was circulating just to see what kind of unhinged shit they were posting and it was all in this genre of making men brain dead and desperate to fuck. some of it was written from the pov of the guy losing his capacity for intelligent thought and read more like a horror novel than porn. i am an archaeology student btw
that’s why bottom povs aren’t very common. It’s not a fun time for us usually
hm.
(screenshot from readonlymind.com’s tag page. i have no idea how representative that is of like, the broader internet, i just picked it because i happen to know it has tags for that, and also because making people ‘brain dead and desperate to fuck’ is definitely the kind of story you find there)
(i’m just saying. maybe it’s just not a fun time for you)
Mm, Read Only Mind got conquered by the Affini Compact has a distinct audience that I *do* suspect skews more bottom than, say, the Erotic Mind-Control Story Archive.
But also yeah, a lot of people are in fact into the idea of having that done to them.
But also also…hmm…*reads over replies very carefully*…if I’m *very* generous I *can* see the second one as being an outburst of frustration about how hard a time they’re having finding porn that *isn’t* aimed at people who fantasise about being the top in an erotic horror. (If I’m being honest with myself, though, I think I’m just projecting.) First one definitely does seem to just be mocking, even if it does in fact suck how often I run facefirst into horror when I was looking for fluff.
—
…I appear to have written so many commentary tags that I ran out of tag display limits. You know what, here:
#if you’d asked me two days ago I’d have included a bit about how every work of erotic fiction has *something* subjectively wrong with it
#it’s not like it’s *exclusive* to horror about turning people into mindless sluts
#every porn has something (usually many things) in it that’s squicky or where it’s obvious that the author’s view of what’s hot is thirty degrees clockwise of yours
#nobody’s tastes are ever going to be a perfect match
#you just have to make the best of it and try to find works with tolerable good-to-meh-to-ugh ratios
#and try to cope with the growing sense of frustration in the back of your mind muttering about how *none* of these people have any fucking *taste*
#if you’d asked me two days ago I’d have said that
#yesterday‚ however‚ I came across a fic on AO3 that is‚ in fact‚ perfect
#there is nothing wrong with it (that is to say‚ grating about it) whatsoever
#no horror‚ no rape‚ no genitals‚ no BDSM‚ not even a tickle scene
#and the *choices* about where and how to place the narrative focus are…they’re…they’re *correct*
#it reads like the porn *I* would write if I were good at writing porn
#I’m still trying to wrap my head around the fact that this is a thing that exists
#I feel like I’m repeating myself here because I already wrote a glowing review for my comment/link roundup
#but I haven’t posted that yet‚ so from the perspective of the rest of you this is the first I’ve mentioned it
#I guess what I’m saying here viscerally is that “Give These People a Break” in the AO3 Anonymous collection is a new bar in quality and every other MC writer in the world needs to get on its level
#(*yes* including the writers who think “MC” stands for “motorcycle club’’‚ why not)
#and what I’m saying here intellectually is that I acknowledge that they won’t do that because actually their tastes are different from mine and Their Kinks Are Okay
#but it can sometimes be hard to tell the difference between venting and kinkshaming from the outside
#(P.S. to be clear I have nothing against affini fic)
#(many of them are quite good)
#((”Abscission“ especially is well worth reading for the proverbial articles *alone*))
#(but it *is* striking how large a percentage of the front page it makes up)
@sigmaleph replied: “@brin-bellway i am not confident on anything like exact ratios but i certainly never had much trouble finding bottom pov stories on emcsa, either”
True, yeah.
(again if I am being honest with myself here, in large part you happened to stumble into the feelings I was already having about having to wade through that kind of stuff in hopes of finding something decent(ly appealing to me), plus the state of “holy shit” I have been in over finding something far-beyond-decent for the past like 24 hours)
Tags:
#anyway I am approximately four different kinds of tired right now #I had better go to bed‚ which should at least help with *some* of them #good night #replies #is the blue I see the same as the blue you see #sexuality and lack thereof #people who can distinguish between their drive for sleep and drive for sex fascinate me #nsfw text #venting cw #discourse cw?
(it’s about a kink caption which is picture of a dude in his underwear talking about ‘slutweed’, which is, ofc, weed that makes you slutty)
two replies:
i found this blog back when this screenshot was circulating just to see what kind of unhinged shit they were posting and it was all in this genre of making men brain dead and desperate to fuck. some of it was written from the pov of the guy losing his capacity for intelligent thought and read more like a horror novel than porn. i am an archaeology student btw
that’s why bottom povs aren’t very common. It’s not a fun time for us usually
hm.
(screenshot from readonlymind.com’s tag page. i have no idea how representative that is of like, the broader internet, i just picked it because i happen to know it has tags for that, and also because making people ‘brain dead and desperate to fuck’ is definitely the kind of story you find there)
(i’m just saying. maybe it’s just not a fun time for you)
Mm, Read Only Mind got conquered by the Affini Compact has a distinct audience that I *do* suspect skews more bottom than, say, the Erotic Mind-Control Story Archive.
But also yeah, a lot of people are in fact into the idea of having that done to them.
But also also…hmm…*reads over replies very carefully*…if I’m *very* generous I *can* see the second one as being an outburst of frustration about how hard a time they’re having finding porn that *isn’t* aimed at people who fantasise about being the top in an erotic horror. (If I’m being honest with myself, though, I think I’m just projecting.) First one definitely does seem to just be mocking, even if it does in fact suck how often I run facefirst into horror when I was looking for fluff.
—
…I appear to have written so many commentary tags that I ran out of tag display limits. You know what, here:
#if you’d asked me two days ago I’d have included a bit about how every work of erotic fiction has *something* subjectively wrong with it
#it’s not like it’s *exclusive* to horror about turning people into mindless sluts
#every porn has something (usually many things) in it that’s squicky or where it’s obvious that the author’s view of what’s hot is thirty degrees clockwise of yours
#nobody’s tastes are ever going to be a perfect match
#you just have to make the best of it and try to find works with tolerable good-to-meh-to-ugh ratios
#and try to cope with the growing sense of frustration in the back of your mind muttering about how *none* of these people have any fucking *taste*
#if you’d asked me two days ago I’d have said that
#yesterday‚ however‚ I came across a fic on AO3 that is‚ in fact‚ perfect
#there is nothing wrong with it (that is to say‚ grating about it) whatsoever
#no horror‚ no rape‚ no genitals‚ no BDSM‚ not even a tickle scene
#and the *choices* about where and how to place the narrative focus are…they’re…they’re *correct*
#it reads like the porn *I* would write if I were good at writing porn
#I’m still trying to wrap my head around the fact that this is a thing that exists
#I feel like I’m repeating myself here because I already wrote a glowing review for my comment/link roundup
#but I haven’t posted that yet‚ so from the perspective of the rest of you this is the first I’ve mentioned it
#I guess what I’m saying here viscerally is that “Give These People a Break” in the AO3 Anonymous collection is a new bar in quality and every other MC writer in the world needs to get on its level
#(*yes* including the writers who think “MC” stands for “motorcycle club’’‚ why not)
#and what I’m saying here intellectually is that I acknowledge that they won’t do that because actually their tastes are different from mine and Their Kinks Are Okay
#but it can sometimes be hard to tell the difference between venting and kinkshaming from the outside
#(P.S. to be clear I have nothing against affini fic)
#(many of them are quite good)
#((”Abscission“ especially is well worth reading for the proverbial articles *alone*))
#(but it *is* striking how large a percentage of the front page it makes up)
Tags:
#reply via reblog #tag rambles #now with added hyperlinks and segments longer than 140 characters #nsfw text #sexuality and lack thereof #people who can distinguish between their drive for sleep and drive for sex fascinate me #is the blue I see the same as the blue you see #venting cw #discourse cw? #recs
I started reading Carolyn Elliott’s Existential Kink because of this blog post, am 1/3 through, and cannot imagine a book that could more appeal to me while also belonging to a genre that will say, “What [this book] is presenting to you here is … a witchy, tricksy, feminine path to enlightenment that’s quite a bit different than the more publicly vaunted, masculine routes of asceticism, contemplation, and yogic saintliness.”
The ultimate operation the book is trying to perform on the reader, assuming the reader has preexisting masochistic tendencies they can amplify, is to get them to notice the pleasure they can potentially take in the most uncomfortable moments of their lives and reframe it as pleasure.
The worldview/aesthetic the book tries to impart:
[I thought,] “God is one kinky-ass motherfucker. God—the divine—whatever He/She/IT is—creates this world, and this world is a gonzo horror show of war and rape and abuse and addiction and disaster. If God is running the show, God must like it this way!” Now, you might guess that a thought like that would lead to some kind of terrible nihilistic breakdown. But for me… actually, it didn’t. Instead, it made me smile—perversely—and gave me a feeling of lightness, play, and possibility. …
Well if God is a kinky freak and I’m a part of God like all these “spiritual” people say, maybe deep down I’m a kinky freak too. And maybe I can get more in touch with my divine nature by giving myself permission to like all the scary stuff in life, instead of just resenting it. …
I propose that all our suffering and stuckness in life comes from forgetting that we’re divine sparks playing a wild kinky game and that great miracles can come forth in our lives when we reverse the process of forgetting by deliberately reclaiming the pleasure of the game.
The title is well chosen! The book is trying to get the reader to treat life itself as one big BDSM scene that they can lean into if they want.
Which, this is a weird sell, but it happens that I’m totally into this and have been doing it on my own*, so having someone dump a whole framework of doing life that extends this is delightful and intellectually stimulating!
* I used to be normally socially anxious where I just felt awful, but these days when I’m uncomfortable because I said something stupid or cruel, or someone’s pushing my boundaries, 50% of the time I notice and go, “whoa, I’m uncomfortable, that’s interesting and nice in a way”. I do this simply because it’s better to feel nice and interested than awful. Raw misery is hard to spin this way, but anything complicated where there’s some human nuance in it provides a launchpad for this transition.
The author describes “orgasmic meditation” where she lies down for a time-limited period, focuses on the sensation as someone rubs her clit, and does not attempt to change the kind of stimuli she is receiving. There are obviously strokes she likes and strokes she is less into, and part of the point is to expand the range of things she can enjoy – going from “oh, not this one” to “yes, even this one”. And you can apply this same process to, well, life:
This practice of “getting off on every stroke” can, by analogy, be extended beyond the context of Orgasmic Meditation (or sex) and be applied to life, wherein one considers everything that happens as a “stroke.” As in, comments that other people make to you—those are strokes. Surprising situations that arise—those are strokes. A critical monologue from some inner voice—those are strokes.
Also very congruent with how I (would like to) think of life.
I would never recommend this book broadly. Either you’re open to being expansively masochistic like this appealing or you aren’t. But man is it good at articulating a cohesive is+ought framework that, if you could lean into it, can get you to do this top-down reinterpretation of more experiences as pleasurable.
Tags:
#(I’m going to be ragging on this‚ so I want to say upfront that if you are someone who gets something valuable out of this then that’s great #and you should live your joy) #(I reserve my emotions here for the pattern‚ not the readers) #…okay maybe this is overly meta but I *am* kind of fascinated by my visceral revulsion at this? #it’s kind of trainwrecky‚ I think #somebody actually managed to combine #”zealousness-of-converts!Buddhists waxing lyrical about how being a p-zombie is the highest form of existence” #and ”those assholes in kink spaces who think that because *they’re* into BDSM that everyone with non-normative sexual interests is too” #(with a touch of salvia memory-game shit for flavour!) #I did not expect to see *those* synthesised #(and yet it makes so much sense in hindsight) #and I have to take my hat off to it even as I hate every fibre of its being #tag rambles #sexuality and lack thereof #is the blue I see the same as the blue you see #nsfw text #amnesia cw #death tw? #I don’t know‚ what’s the content warning for enlightenment
Ami couldn’t stop staring into the darkness. It was as if it simply swallowed up every stray particle of light that came her way, leaving her eyes so completely and totally accustomed to the blacker-than-blackness that greeted her gaze that she couldn’t even imagine illumination anymore. She didn’t know if she was blinking or not; her eyelids felt like they were fluttering and drooping, but there was no difference between the world of utter shadow that greeted her when they slipped shut and when they struggled, desperately and ineffectually, to open. Her optic nerves were simply shutting down from lack of stimulus, taking her mind along with it.
She knew there was a person with her in the room; she could feel fingers caressing her nudity, groping and squeezing her body. But the latex suit they wore blended in perfectly with the impossibly deep shadows of the room, absorbing every last bit of luminescence until Ami’s eyes tricked her and she couldn’t pick them out from the black background they walked past. The only sign they even existed was when she saw them cover her skin with a silhouette of pure darkness, brushing her with caresses that kept her dazed and disoriented and helpless. She knew there must be light coming into the room from somewhere–she could see her own tawny flesh, at least when her stare wasn’t captivated by the perfect darkness that drew her ever deeper. But she didn’t know where it was coming from. Everywhere she looked, she saw only void.
The absence of visual stimuli numbed her brain, leaving her progressively more vacant and empty and desperate to be filled. It was as though the absolute blackness was leaking down through her eyes into her mind, her very soul, deadening Ami’s will and making her increasingly helpless to think her own thoughts anymore. When she felt the invisibly dark cock brushing against her lips, she opened wide for it simply to feel something concrete and tangible–she didn’t know whether it was flesh behind the sheath of latex, or a silicone strap-on, and she didn’t care. The shaft was real inside her mouth. She could center herself on it. She could anchor her mind to it. When it popped out, leaving her alone, she almost cried.
She knew she couldn’t take much more of this. Ami could sense her mind teetering on a precipice of utter subjugation, the sheer void around her leaving her unmoored to the point of total personality collapse. “Please,” she whimpered, her voice almost sounding as if it too was absorbed by the endless darkness, “please, I’ll do anything. Please, use my cunt, use my mouth, use my ass, I… I’ll be yours forever, I promise.” Her cheeks burned furiously at the depths to which she’d sunk, but she couldn’t stop herself from babbling out desperate pleas of submission and obedience. “Please, just t-tell me who you want me to be. Tell me what you want me to do. I, I’ll do anything, just command me. Just please tell me what I have to do. Please. Please tell me. Please.”
And she heard it. The voice in the darkness. Her new owner. Her salvation. The command that would tether her soul back to her body. Ami nodded gratefully as she heard, “By accepting this brainwashing you confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, you are in no way affiliated with Anish Kapoor, and you are not being fucked into obedience on behalf of Anish Kapoor or an associate of Anish Kapoor….”
#I don’t normally reblog porn and this porn isn’t even my style #but I have to admit that ending is amazing #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #vantablack saga #sexuality and lack thereof #nsfw text #rape tw #this probably deserves some other warning tag but I am not sure what
Fortunately, Arduino’s pretty easy to pick up, even if you don’t know how to code. There’s a lot of learn to code kits with Arduino, and a massive DIY community with lots of forums.
If you’re itching for something cheap and small that can connect to the internet (say, for lots of little wirelessly controlled toys talking to a local device your private internet), there are wifi enabled Arduino boards like the WeMos D1 Mini and Adafruit Featherwing HUZZAH ESP32 boards. The esp32 is a little computer chip that does wifi, so as long as it’s on board or can be added on, you’ve got wireless connectivity. There’s lots of sample sketches for communicating with local devices.
There’s a lot of potential for Arduino and raspberry pis in this category. You can make tasers, locks, pistons, pumps, eye trackers, muscle sensors, screens, twitter api based controls, local wired and wireless controls, screens, and maybe more. Actually, if you search for DIY Arduino electronic sex toy stuff, you can find a lot of interesting boards and existing projects to copy.
I know that one of the relatively easy to make projects is a buttplug that measures orgasm intensity but I believe it uses a 3D printed casing and this is your reminder that 3D printed materials are nearly impossible to properly sanitize so mold a hollow core plug out of silicone or make sure to use a condom (which, because of the composition and texture of 3d print plastic you’d probably want to do anyway).
Tags:
#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #(”i have the gumption‚ at least. like icarus‚ when he did that thing”) #sexuality and lack thereof #nsfw text #the more you know
This review was Too Hot For Tumblr™, so here it is, brought back from the dead.
Also, looking for more feedback/thoughts about the way the pictures and video are handled here, as they’re a bit more involved (and graphic, although no actual nudity is involved) than the earlier examples.
I like the three-tier description/filter/original system for the images. I think it fulfils both halves of the dual purpose of content warnings very well: giving [people who don’t want to see it at all] an opportunity to back out, and giving [people who are okay with choosing to see it but don’t want it to take them by surprise] a heads-up.
The descriptions are good both at giving a chance for informed consent and at letting you know what’s going on (if you choose not to look); the filtered images are definitely less in-your-face than the originals, offering both a way to see what’s happening and a way to prepare yourself before moving on to the originals.
I find the tabbed display intuitive and easy to use, though to be fair I’ve only tried it on a laptop and not on mobile.
Tags:
#reply via reblog #sexuality and lack thereof #asexuality #The Last Tumblr Apocalypse #nsfw text
By what right does a government, entrusted with the preservation of liberty, see fit to prohibit consensual acts? This question, which was the catalyst of the Sexual Revolution, has led this author to reconsider all manner of social taboos.
While considering the rise of PDAs on campus, I considered how the right to show affection had superseded the expectation of those around them to feel comfortable. This is a positive change, primarily because the taboo against this act is rooted in the belief that people have the right to control the expression of their peers. This value has no place in a free society. From this position, I considered more extreme examples of the same principle. If society has no right to prohibit public signs of love, why should it prohibit its members from the literal act of love? It is this question that led me to my thesis, that it should be legal to have sex in public.
The first objection that will be raised against this is that the other people do not consent to seeing this. This response misrepresents the nature of consent. Many of you have seen a video in which consent is explained using the metaphor of giving someone tea. In this video, consent is understood to be a state in which the two people involved in sex agree to the act. Nowhere in that explanation does the opinion of those around them come into consideration. Because of this, saying that public sex violates the rights of passersby, or that they should just “get a room”, holds no weight.
The second point is that public sex does no harm to those who witness it. As with PDAs, there is no injustice that one can point to in order to justify its prohibition. The most likely grievance one could have is that people having sex on the ground would cause people to move around them. This is certainly an inconvenience, but not one that warrants government intervention. The worst-case scenario is that the coitus occurs in an exit or other narrow location. In this scenario, the appropriate action would be to use applicable fire codes to identify this as a safety violation. They could then be punished accordingly, public sex not being relevant to the matter. In neither case can the public claim harm that comes directly from the act of making love, but from factors that would be relevant whether or not sex was involved.
As I end this, I should address the reader’s assumption that the author is a crazed sex maniac. On the contrary, I am only interested in freedom for its own sake. I have no desire to partake in the act, nor would I gain sexual pleasure from seeing this in my daily life. I am content to know that the government will not interfere with those who chose to do so. Being free does not require that you partake in an act, it only requires that you reserve the right to do so, should the desire come. That is why I write this, so that we may all be a little more free.
People should not have sex in public because–given the fluids involved–it is unsanitary and against the interests of public health. They also should not talk in public for the same reason.
would you then support the idea that those having sex should be responsible for the cleanup of their own fluids?
I highly doubt that would be enforceable in practice. Our current public-health measures are unreliable and generally inadequate: we can’t even prevent restaurants from serving rotting food!
(while you could argue the *later* instances were a natural punishment for forcing service workers into proximity with them during a plague, those poor bastards who simply ordered the least popular variant of chicken during Christmas break absolutely did not deserve what they got)
By requiring people who have sex to do so in (ideally) their own space or (at minimum) a space owned by people in a good position to trace the sex back to them, we both increase the probability that they will have disinfectant available and ensure that, if they fail to use it (or fail to use it thoroughly enough), it will either harm *themselves* or harm someone with the capacity to figure it out and seek restitution. One of many situations where we eliminate the tragedy of the commons by eliminating the commons.
Tags:
#reply via reblog #discourse cw #unsanitary cw #nsfw text #in which Brin has a job #in which Brin has a food poisoning phobia #illness mention
Brinens and Things 