headcanons

~ Brin ~ 1 Comment

lenyberry:

sinistropteryx:

So everyone knows that the whole “winged human” depiction of angels is more of a renaissance art thing, and angels are actually supposed to look like weird otherworldly monsters with many eyes and six wings and things like that.

Except that doesn’t sound otherworldly at all. That sounds like the most common group of animals in the world.

Many eyes? Insects can have thousands.

Six wings? While most winged insects have only 2-4, there’s a few species that can have 6.

Conclusion: angels are talking bugs. Thanks for coming to my ted talk

GIANT talking bugs. That explains the whole “be not afraid” thing…

Tags:

#angels #bugs #headcanons

{{next post in sequence}}

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

hamnox:

robin-scherbatskyz:

marauders70s:

Honestly during the battle of Hogwarts I feel immensely cheated at not having more Peeves v. Voldemort time because Peeves can’t die and is a complete asshole and I just really want that interaction in my soul of how furious Voldemort would be with Peeves for just existing. Voldemort can’t banish or kill Peeves so he would be trying to direct his Death Eater troops with Peeves floating three feet to the left repeating everything Voldemort says in a mocking high-pitched voice.

IF IT ISN’T LITTLE TOM-TOM! Psycho Tommy! Conquered the world yet? I guess NOT

I like to believe that one of the things Tom learned on his excursions was a poltergeist exorcism ritual, just for the satisfaction of knowing how to crush old annoyances. He knew he probably wouldn’t get the opportunity to use it when he applied for the DADA position, with all the other things to do, but in the event of a confrontration the threat would taste oh so sweet on his tongue… A pity Dumbledore would never take a suggestion coming from him.

He mentioned the ritual to Quirrel. Quirrel reasoned it would draw unnecessary attention. Personally he doubted Quirrel was competent enough to achieve it.

Snape could have done the ritual. He even seemed keen on the idea, among other school reforms. New duties and rebellious students and death eaters kept the headmaster run ragged.

On winning the battle of Hogwarts, Tom wasn’t going to stoop to storming the castle to find one poltergeist. Peeves was a childhood nuisance; to treat him as a nemesis would be giving him a distasteful amount of legitimacy.

But Tom did bring the materials. And if Peeves decided to rain on his parade, well, a Dark Lord couldn’t possibly let such disrespect stand.

Tags:

#Harry Potter #headcanons

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couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name:

spideyandstark:

couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name:

personally I like to think steve’s birthday isn’t actually July 4th but someone asked him when his birthday was when he was doing his little show tour thingy and he just said it as an accident and/or a panic response in a bid to seem even more patriotic and everyone believed him and now it’s like 100 years later and he’s too deep in the lie to back out now bc he knows all the avenger’s would fucking publicly roast him if he admitted july 4th wasn’t actually his birthday- like he would literally never live that down- so he lives his life in fear that some bitch ass historian is gonna find his birth certificate and expose him 

avengers: happy birthday, steve!

bucky, eyes narrowing: what the fuck your birthday isn’t until-

steve, holding back tears: shut up

Bucky tries to hand him a birthday card one cold December day, and Steve tackles him out a window before anyone else can see what he’s holding

Tags:

#Marvel #embarrassment squick #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #birthday

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

gcu-sovereign:

humanfist:

unpretty:

unpretty:

come to think of it, why wouldn’t someone with superman’s powers use them for physical comedy? like. buster keaton style. or dick van dyke. he is invulnerable and can fly, those are the perfect circumstances for a pratfall. half the time only he is aware that he is joking and he just looks like a clumsy asshole but he knows in his heart that the timing on that gag was perf. add this to my list of stupid fucking headcanons.

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clark sits down too aggressively in a desk chair, rolls backward across basically the whole office before the chair tips backward and he rolls out of it and into a vending machine in the break room that drops candy on his head because he whacked it. lois is laughing so hard she can’t breathe but the joke is on her, he did that on purpose. he planned that gag for days. she is laughing with him, not at him. who is the real winner here. score one for kent.

I just want to see him run off the edge of a cliff and not fall until he looks down.

Glory Girl could substantially up her Amusing Children at the Hospital game.

Tags:

#Superman #headcanon accepted #I especially like the not-falling-until-he-looks-down

hogwarts memes

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devilrie:

– everyone answering “no, i’m fred” to “are you [insert Y/N]” even hermione
– everything draco does ever
– calling blast ended skrewts “power bottoms”
– calling newt scamander bad variations of his name like nerd sandwicher etc
– colin creevey using that one picture he managed to get of hermione punching draco as a reaction image
– shouting “spank me daddy” at the whomping willow
– [pointing at random object] that’s a portkey
– every single cat is professor mcgonagall

 

bookavid:

why

 

tawghasa:

– POTTER

 

yourjacketisnowdry:

– ever since snape’s “bottle fame, brew fortune” speech students just go on and on with it – “flambé success, bake brilliance” “Can you tutor me in charms?” “TUTOR you? I can teach you how to SAUTÉ EXCELLENCE.”

 

caffeinepants:

– [random object] is totally a hufflepuff

– remember that game where someone yells “SHATNER” and you have to overact? same thing except it’s “TRELAWNEY” and you have to use whatever you’re holding to make a ludicrous prediction

– a more popular variation is “LOCKHART” to make up a pompous story about using whatever you’re holding to drive the [monster] out of [town]

– calling hippogriffs “leggy birbs”

– “Our beloved headmaster Albert Dumpsterfire/Aqueous Disillusionment/Aberdeen Decapitation…”

– shitty incantations ( “The Graying Hair Charm? Make-me-bloody-ancient-osia.” )

 

sleepyysalamiri:

reblogging for albert dumpsterfire xD

 

classicantics:

-the dumbledore one, except you keep adding incorrect names, like albert pensive wallace herbert richard flamingo sherbet tango luthor…

-*peeves appears* IT DAT BOI

-”i’d rather be petrified”

-”so a shack gets to scream and it’s all normal and haunted, but when i do it i’m disturbing class and a nuisance”

 

parseltonquinq:

I will sell my soul for all of this in a fic

Tags:

#Harry Potter #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog

The Evidence:

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fledgling-witch:

the-macra:

local-shop:

fledgling-witch:

  • The Magic School Bus can time travel
  • When asked, Ms. Frizzle denies that she “knows everything”
  • However, Ms. Frizzle always knows what her students are up to, knows the answer to every question they ask her, and never shows fear even when in extreme mortal peril, as if she’s experienced this all before
  • Although we know she was in a rock band called the Frizzlettes and was a Shakespearean actress, Ms. Frizzle’s childhood remains mysterious
  • Ms. Frizzle is EXACTLY the sort of person to travel back in time to teach herself, and is in fact the most likely fictional character to do so
  • Nobody is ever named “Valerie Frizzle” at birth
  • Ms. Frizzle dresses queerly and laughs at her own bad jokes
  • A lot of the series is about Arnold learning to take chances, make mistakes, and get messy – that phrase is more or less targeted at him as a student
  • Ms. Frizzle looks a lot like a grown-up Arnold

Holy shit???????

She literally has a giant storeroom full of barrels of pickles because she loves pickles so much what more evidence do you need

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Tags:

#… #interesting #Magic School Bus #(I had to google the pickle thing) #(apparently spironolactone causes salt cravings and this often manifests in pickle form)

If DS9 Characters Had Tumblr

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

julian-bashir-protection-squad:

Julian: Weirdly specific biology memes and 3am shitposts

Jadzia: Aesthetic posts and absolutely genius relationship advice

Benjamin: Recipes. Nothing else. Just recipes.

Nerys: Feminism + actually good poems about the Cardassian occupation

Elim: Photos of tailoring projects and photos of Julian that the poor doctor doesn’t remember being taken

Miles: Stembolts in Sixty Seconds and other weird engineering tutorials

Jake: Fanfiction

Quark: just freaking shitposts and you know it.

Tags:

#Star Trek #DS9

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subspacecommunication:

ds9shameblog:

i cant believe @subspacecommunication  singlehandedly redeemed risa by suggesting it has something other than impeccably manicured astroturf sex parks

Legoland Risa is a big deal and nobody can convince me otherwise. :D

Whenever any character talks about Risa with those leery grins on their faces, unless they specifically state they’re interested in sex, they’re definitely talking about Legoland. They’re all really excited to go to Legoland Risa. It’s the biggest Legoland in the Alpha Quadrant (it’s the biggest Legoland ever, but there’s a running joke that the Gamma Quadrant houses an even bigger Legoland nobody has ever seen), and has lego recreations of half the Federation fleet, and little lego people of every Federation species.

Nobody goes to Risa for sex. Everyone goes to Risa for the lego.

Tags:

#Star Trek #headcanon accepted

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jumpingjacktrash:

roachpatrol:

do the hogwarts cafeteria tables have a restriction on who’s allowed to get coffee? i want to believe there’s safety measures in place to make sure ravenclaws don’t get a six cups a day habit before they hit puberty but this is a school that encourages its students to play high-speed flying murderball so 

yeah no this is hogwarts aka murder high

pretty sure the slytherins could be doing cocaine off the desks in potions class without getting in trouble, and hufflepuffs definitely sell weed out of the greenhouses

gryffindors, of course, only get high on righteousness and violence

Tags:

#Harry Potter #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #drugs cw #death mention

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sleepymarmot:

I’M SCREAMING THESE PEOPLE SOLVED IT

(Source)

Tags:

#oh thank god #Star Trek #DS9 #(for those of you who don’t know:) #(at one point this character is kidnapped and replaced with a shapeshifting infiltrator) #(Doylistically the writers only decided this at the beginning of the two-parter in which it is revealed) #(but they retconned it as having been about a month) #(but the thing is) #(there are *so many time cues* throughout the preceding handful of episodes) #(that it really looks like you’re *supposed* to go back and figure out which episode he was switched in) #(and rewatch with the shapeshifter’s real identity in mind) #(but you’re not) #(and if you try it doesn’t make any sense) #(because they weren’t actually writing him as a shapeshifting infiltrator at the time)