fun with loopholes

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

serinemolecule:

From the SSC meetup FAQ:

Are there any rules on what avatars we can choose?

Because someone came in the form of a dachshund the size of a small apartment building, I have instituted a rule that you cannot have an avatar larger than an SUV.

But I feel most comfortable when instantiated in a body of supernormal size. Can you make an exception?

Is an SUV not supernormal enough to satisfy this bizarre impulse?

Let’s say it isn’t.

Well, you see, your size imposes a negative externality on other users, decreasing their enjoyment of the meeting. We have to account for that. So unfortunately, I can’t make an exception.

What if the utility I gain from being a dachshund the size of a small apartment building exceeds the summed decrements in utility this causes others?

Well…then we are all in luck. You see, the Hubs metaverse is scaled such that the average avatar, were they transplanted into our world, would be the size of a small apartment building. It is merely an illusion of perspective that most avatars do not appear to be the size of a small apartment building. Thus, merely by showing up as a dachshund you will gain the utility you crave while avoiding imposing upon others.

What if the utility I gain from being a dachshund that, relative to the median avatar, appears to be the size of a small apartment building exceeds the summed decrements in utility this causes others?

Then you would be a sort of positional utility monster. Unfortunately, here at the SSC/LessWrong Mozilla Hubs Meetup we have precommitted to following a strict deontological rule which obliges us to ban all such creatures.

Tags:

#fun with loopholes #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #(I didn’t laugh *this* time but I remember laughing the first time I read it)

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

comparativelysuperlative:

The MPAA allows a maximum of one “f-word” to retain a rating of PG-13.

There is some wiggle room on this. But not infinite amounts of wiggle room.

The decimal expansion of pi contains all possible finite substrings. The same is true in any other finite base. This includes base 36. 

The base-36 expansion of pi includes more than one (an infinite number) of instances of a forbidden four-character string. Math is therefore rated R.

 

jadagul:

While we believe this is true, I’m pretty sure it’s still a conjecture and not yet proven.

 

the-moti:

The first couple trillion digits of the base ten expansion of pi are known. Presumably it should not be difficult to calculate at least the first trillion digits of the base 36 expansion which heuristically should contain hundreds of thousands of f-bombs. Checking this should be enough to secure the R-rating, without proving the full normality conjecture.

 

king-of-men:

Also, think how immensely interesting it would be if the heuristic is wrong and there’s no f-bombs in the first trillion digits!

Tags:

#math #I didn’t actually laugh aloud but it still amused me enough to reblog #fun with loopholes

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

starry-nightengale:

Sleeping Beauty AU where the princess was born on a Leap Day, so when the evil fairy curses her to prick her finger “on her 16th birthday”, her family realizes that’s not the same thing as her 16th year of life and she’ll actually be in her 60′s when it happens.

 

laurasimonsdaughter:

By the time the Royal Counsellor has finished speaking the King looks slightly less like he might faint and the Queen actually looks a little hopeful.

“Are you certain?” she pressed.

“Absolutely,” the Counsellor assured her. “I had one of my clerks take notes during all the fairy’s speeches for the exact purpose of studying their phrasing.”

“What,” the King blinked. “Even the good ones?”

The counsellor sniffed. “Especially the good ones.”

“So…so we can truly argue that it is the birthday that counts and not the passing of the years?” asked the Queen, colour returning to her cheeks.

“Indeed!” the Counsellor said with a smile. “So if my math is correct your daughter will be sixty-four when the curse enters into effect.”

“That is hardly what I would call a long and prosperous life!” the King protested.

“Ah, but it does give her Royal Highness the Princess a lot more time to find this contractually necessary one true love,” his Counsellor explained. “Quite a reasonable amount of time I would say, if she happens to be of a romantic and monogamous persuasion, of course.”

The royal couple looked equal parts relieved and bewildered.

“But there’s no need to worry about that just yet,” the Counsellor said comfortingly. “And besides. Times are moving on. That is the entire reason we have the High Court of Magical Justice. Why, just last month a transformed prince was kissed back to human by his platonic life partner after successful litigation against the original layer of the curse! It is riveting caselaw.”

“…this is a good thing, yes?” the King ventured.

“Very good,” the Counsellor nodded.

“Well then!” Her Majesty the Queen beamed. “In that case, I say we continue the celebrations!”

“Quite right, Your Majesty, quite right,” the Counsellor said with a bow. “If you need me, I shall be in my study.”

 

hellenhighwater:

It is a tenet of contract law that the meanings of contractual language are construed against its drafters. I think it makes perfect sense to interpret the language of curses against their casters as well.

 

obeekris:

Better curse breaking through semantic specificity.

Tags:

#Leap Day #fun with loopholes #fanfic

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

prokopetz:

Inadvisable D&D campaign premise #137: the Old Republic’s code of laws is unique in that it binds the natural world as well as human society. While these laws don’t always work in humanity’s favour, they establish a web of obligations that can be leveraged for humanity’s advantage; thus it’s possible to bargain with a storm, make contract with a river, or take the seasons to court. As the the features of the natural world have no particular ability to communicate or assert their needs, they’re assigned human advocates, who swear fearsome (and magically binding) oaths to represent the best interests of their “clients”.

Of course, nothing lasts forever. The Old Republic fell apart centuries ago, dissolving into a loose affiliation of sporadically warring provinces that each claim to be the Republic’s only legitimate successor. Even in this fractured state, the old laws retain their temporal power, but they can’t be modified or repealed, as no valid legislative body can be convened. In the campaign’s present day, those laws are nearly four hundred years out of date, which often places them considerably out of step with the needs and concerns of contemporary society – but any province that tries to simply discard them loses the protections they afford and is promptly ravaged by natural disasters.

The player characters in this campaign are a roving team of lawyer-adventurers who specialise in devising and implementing solutions to the bizarre legal conundrums that emerge from this state of affairs.

Tags:

#story ideas I will never write #fun with loopholes

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

eternalgirlscout:

Avatar OC concept: a pedantic earthbender with a degree in geology who can bend ice on a technicality

 

bananonbinary:

the implication that bending is completely reliant on whether you think you should be able to instead of like…innate laws of the universe pleases me greatly

 

lesbianbrachiosaurus:

me bending someone’s bones: buddy they’re practically just limestone I mean it’s on you for walking around full of rocks

 

sufficientlylargen:

A waterbender, levitating a slice of pizza: See, I believe that pizza is technically a soup, not a sandwich, so

Tags:

#Avatar: The Last Airbender #story ideas I will never write #fun with loopholes #I love when superpowered people talk the universe into letting them do stuff #by arguing that the ability logically follows from the powers they already have

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

guitarbeard:

Wizard who got tired of fighting and casts fucked up unethical spells like “super brain hemorrhage” to end them faster

 

blackkkabutops:

One time I did “Summon Water” inside a guys lungs and the GM allowed it because he had been playing for years and never seen anyone do that

 

indyexploits:

Me “I can raise the temperature of a space by 5 degrees (Fahrenheit) per success”
DM “Okay.”
Me “And that’s 6 successes, so 30 degrees…”
DM “Okay…”
Me “And ‘inside the human body’ is a space, right?”
DM “…I don’t like where this is going.”
Me “So I’m going to raise the temperature inside his body 30 degrees.”
DM “Yeah, so he’s dead now. He was fine, and then went through all the stages of heat stroke in half a second before his body went ‘No thank you’ and just shut off to stop it from being so hot. Good job.”

 

unabashedlybi:

17d677e759cc6e9ee1f099f4a3e3f402744bc503

 

swimmer963:

This is my aesthetic. 

Tags:

#fun with loopholes #death tw #murder cw

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

m4ge:

a quick step by step guide on what to do if you come back to your apartment and find yourself locked out because your front door is frozen shut

  1. kick the bottom of the door for 10 minutes
  2. text your landlord
  3. remember your landlord is on vacation and also in her mid 50′s so it takes about 36 hours to receive a response
  4. briefly wonder why the fuck you moved the canada
  5. remember that college tuition is significantly cheaper here than in the united states 
  6. look up and notice your cat is at the window, staring at you. he paws at the window lightly and meows. it’s devastating. his eyes are so big and imploring. decide that you have to get inside your apartment at all costs. not even god himself can stop you from feeding your cat his chicken wet food dinner. frida kahlo herself could descend from the heavens and ask “hey you wanna bang?” and you’d say “hell yeah but first let me open this door so i can feed my cat his dinner”
  7. remember there is a starbucks 3 blocks down the street from you
  8. enter. the barista gives you a weird look for entering a starbucks at 7pm on a tuesday
  9. order a venti cup of hot water. you order in french because the barista just said “bonjour” instead of “bonjour, hi.” you have a strong american accent. you hit the r in merci a little too hard to compensate. you embarrass yourself.
  10. exit the starbucks clutching the massive cup of hot water in your hands. it’s burning your fingers.
  11. return. methodically pour the starbucks cup of water all over the the door frame. it begins moving a little but still wont open
  12. back up
  13. ensure your doc martens are properly gripping the sheet of ice covering the ground. many people have told you to stop wearing doc martens in the winter, despite your protests that theyre actually the ideal winter boot. also, you’re a lesbian and punk’s not dead
  14. release a pterodactyl screech and sprint towards the door, slamming the full force of your pathetically tiny 5′2″ 110lb body into it
  15. you dont know any of your neighbors so you dont care about maintaining your pride anyways
  16. the door swings open
  17. run up the stairs
  18. open the actual door to your apartment and yell MOMMY’S HOME MY LITTLE BITCHASS BABY BOY DONT WORRY at your cat
  19. cat flings his body to the ground and starts purring like he does every time you come home
  20. write tumblr post

Tags:

#storytime #our home and cherished land #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #embarrassment squick? #weight cw? #and this one isn’t *quite* right but close enough that I’m going to include it: #fun with loopholes

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

teamgalactica:

god nerfed me by making me allergic to garlic and sunlight

 

valquita:

so, a vampire?

 

teamgalactica:

i can confirm that i am not a vampire as i have blood

 

alparlaboratories:

Is it your blood?

 

teamgalactica:

it is blood, yes

 

alparlaboratories:

Is it blood that has always belonged to you, from the moment of your spawning?

 

teamgalactica:

it is blood, it is in my possession, therefore it is my blood

Tags:

#vampires #blood #fun with loopholes #overly literal interpretations #I didn’t actually laugh aloud but it still amused me enough to reblog