~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

taejira:

bigjaeger:

a support group for vampires who were turned as children or adolescents. a bunch of small, melancholy kid-shaped vampires sitting around in somebody’s living room talking very seriously in tiny voices about current events in the vampire world. a lot of them dress like grandmas because they are as old as a grandma, maybe even ten grandmas. they have a network system where they can call adult-looking vampires to help them get things, drive places, pretend to be parents so child-looking vampires can get into adult movies 

#two vampire friends of the same chronological age #but one was turned at age 11 and the other at age 40 #they pretend to be parent and child but they’re actually more like bickering elderly roommates #bickering elderly roommates who are serial killers

Tags:

#vampires #yes

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

animatedamerican:

so tonight I’m at synagogue, listening to the Purim Night reading of the Book of Esther, like you do

and near the end of this chapter my brain presents me with the following:

nooooo ooooone plots like Haman
calls the shots like Haman
plans a genocide by casting lots like Haman

(It only works with the Hebrew pronunciation of Haman, which, like Gaston, is accented on the second syllable.)

By the time we get home my brain has added:

for there’s none so well-favored and kingly
yes, we all can be certain of that
he’s so rich that his pockets are jingly
and he looks really sharp in a three-cornered hat

*face in hands*

Tags:

#Judaism #Purim #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #someday I should listen to that Gaston song so I know what tune to sing the parodies to #on the other hand that would make them more earwormy #so maybe not #besides it’s still funny regardless of whether you know how to sing it

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

shitpostgenerator:

you:how dare you protect me from sexualizing popular snakes
me:#kinkshaming isn’t controversial

Tags:

#as I expected there *are* Kaa enthusiasts laughing about this in the notes #(I can’t get past his voice personally) #(but I’ve met plenty of people who sexualise at least *one* popular snake and they seem like generally decent folk) #(the following category tag was added retroactively:) #sexuality and lack thereof

~ Brin ~ 1 Comment

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comparativelysuperlative:

hybridzizi:

comparativelysuperlative:

kneesbutt:

westfailia:

what if a catholic priest were to just bless the entire ocean would it turn the entire thing into holy water or do priests have an effective blessing range? does that range increase based on your level? can the pope bless the entire ocean?

so technically any priest could, but shouldn’t for pooping reasons. 

image
image

source: my brother is in his 4th year of study at a catholic seminary, and referred to one of his professors.

So if there’s an emergency where you REALLY NEED to bless the entire Earth water cycle, you’d just need to make sure everyone knows about it and has a self-contained recyclable water supply somehow? If humanity ever gets reduced to a few besieged survivors, the vampires aren’t gonna know what hit them.

But what’s the expiration date on holy water? If you’ve just blessed the entire water cycle, you’re gonna run out of water pretty soon even with your own water supply. What do you do then? You can’t collect rainwater. If the rain killed the vampires, it must be holy, so now what?

On second thought, I’m not sure how much of a problem this even is. If it’s a life-or-death emergency (unlike in the original question) then there better be an exception to the improper use thing. That’s canon. But everyone would still have to use confirmed non-holy water for everything short of that. If civilization ever gets rebuilt afterward, it’d definitely need a completely new sewer system.

Wikipedia says that holy water is disposed of directly into the ground to avoid the sewer system, and this feels like it might imply that it stops being holy then. (Anyone who actually knows want to confirm?) So I guess even if you could see to bless ALL THE WATER, it’d be temporary. On the bright side you can collect some rainwater, eventually all of it, depending on where it evaporated from and how many times. Does anyone have the number of an emergency hydrologist?

Tags:

#oh look an update

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

shitpostgenerator:

*RIDES MY WAY OUT OF LIBERTARIAN HELL ON A PROBLEMATIC LIZARD* GUESS WHO’S ABOUT TO FUCKING WRECK THE GENDER BINARY

Tags:

#…do you know #that *just about* made sense? #I want to ride a problematic lizard #(unless one of its problems is relevant to how good a steed it is I suppose) #(but I doubt a bit of bigotry would matter for that)

something that should have happened in ds9, but didn’t

~ Brin ~ 1 Comment

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ciphergoth:

theusssomeproblem:

senior staff: oh no there is an emergency we need chief obrien

chief obrien: but i need somebody to watch my tiny children oh no

everyone: looks around

everyone: oh no there is nobody to watch the chief’s tiny children

garak: i could watch the tiny children *innocent face*

everyone:…

everyone:…

everyone: no

No, everyone’s forced to say yes, because emergency. And it’s heavily implied that he has some nefarious aim, and we get a build up when the emergency is over and we return to the room where Garak and tiny children are supposed to be. The door opens, and…

Garak has taught them a Cardassian song, and they’ve done some crafts stuff and made a picture. And Garak is all like “what, you don’t trust me? What must you think of me?”

 #then #in the last shot #he has taught one of the kids #how to disable station locks (chroniclesofrettek)

Tags:

#Star Trek #DS9 #oh look an update

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

jumpingjacktrash:

crazyhamlet:

lenoiretvert:

A lesson in Canada’s bilinguality.
Bilinguisme au Canada: une leçon.

French puns on products are seriously one of my favourite things.
Like, sometimes the french translation of a slogan is dumb and long and really bad. And sometimes it’s beautiful.

fromidable i’m peeing

When they’re good, they’re really good.

(When they’re bad, they’re Christmas crackers making “where does Christmas come before Thanksgiving? in the dictionary!” jokes, and straight up translating the English without stopping to consider that “Noël” doesn’t come before “Action de grâces” in the dictionary.)

Tags:

#our home and cherished land #puns

~ Brin ~ 1 Comment

comparativelysuperlative:

kneesbutt:

westfailia:

what if a catholic priest were to just bless the entire ocean would it turn the entire thing into holy water or do priests have an effective blessing range? does that range increase based on your level? can the pope bless the entire ocean?

so technically any priest could, but shouldn’t for pooping reasons. 

image
image

source: my brother is in his 4th year of study at a catholic seminary, and referred to one of his professors.

So if there’s an emergency where you REALLY NEED to bless the entire Earth water cycle, you’d just need to make sure everyone knows about it and has a self-contained recyclable water supply somehow? If humanity ever gets reduced to a few besieged survivors, the vampires aren’t gonna know what hit them.

#this does count as using it as holy water I hope

Well, but there’s also the part about having to see the water, which could get tricky if you’re trying to bless most of the Earth. My first thought was “live satellite video”, but I’m not sure that counts.

Tags:

#the more you know #reply via reblog

{{next post in sequence}}

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

harry2016:

HOLY TRINITY 

 

fannishminded:

MULTIPLE people I am following are asking what these are, why we call them holy when only one has a hole. If they are made by the same company, and what is with us praising these.

I weep for you people, from other countries. WEEP.

Aussies may have Tim Tams.

EU may have Kinder and All sorts of fantastic biscuits.

USA? Has GIRL SCOUT COOKIES.

Not only are these things SINFULLY good, they are only sold for a bit over 1 month of the year, depending on region, that month of the year changes.

That middle one is Chocolate, Caramel Coconut. The left one is Peanut Butter, chocolate and sex on a stick aka crumbly cookie/biscuit.

You can eat em straight from the box, but pros? Pros eat these bad boys frozen.

And thin mints, man. that right one? THIN MINTS. You may have heard of these. Chocolate biscuit infused with mint essence coated in dark chocolate.

Yeah.

Those thin mints.

The Thin Mints for which every grown ass American on a Medical Diet cries for when they see a girlscout.

The Thin Mints with 1000 copycats, and not a one of them successful.

Girl Scouts, regularly boycotted by Fundies and Anti-choice nutters, not only taste amazing, but you get the joy of giving money to a good cause, while subtly flipping the bird at overly wound up fundie groups.

It’s like donating to Planned Parenthood and getting a box of double dark chocolate with fudge filling tim-tams especially made for them.

 

doctorcakeray:

The reason we eat them frozen is that we buy as many boxes of thin mints as we possibly can during that short sale period, and then store them for the dark months, like proud American squirrels.

 

landscapesclothesandfootball:

PROUD AMERICAN SQUIRRELS.

 

pjcalamity:

AMERICAN SQUIRRELS REPRESENT

 

kyliesparks27:

This is the greatest explanation of Girl Scout cookies I’ve ever seen

 

elenabernalt:

Hey… gives us some, haven’t you been told to share?

 

justice-turtle:

NOBODY SHARES THIN MINTS, BUY YOUR OWN ;-)

fuck I missed it again, I hate being broke, SOMEDAY I will have money during February and buy Girl Scout cookies

Are there any late booth sales in your area? I know I looked it up recently and saw that the Girl Scouts of Western New York (my nearest council) had booth sales going well into March.

Unfortunately, my parents have since decided we’re not going to NY again until April. :(

(For the record, Canada has Tim Tams and Kinder. The Girl Guides here sell mint cookies in the autumn, but they have a layer of Oreo-like cream on top, just below the chocolate coating. Since I’ve never been too fond of Oreo cream, I find it renders them inferior to proper Thin Mints.)

Tags:

#Girl Scouts #food #reply via reblog #I own a Samoa keychain #I don’t even *like* Samoas #but it was the only cookie keychain the Girl Scout store had left in stock #(I hear they’re called Caramel DeLites now) #(whatever) #(I doubt they taste any better) #home of the brave

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

mudfleas:

 

shadesofmauve:

magpiedminx:

percychekov:

sirdef:

northwangerabbey:

Sulu’s like “whatever, drama queen.”

is sulu texting

he’s livetweeting chekov’s problems

“You are so Russian.”

The idea of Sulu having a proportionally huge Future!Internet following to what Takei has now is making my day. I’ve been rewatching TOS; now I’m going to interpret every once of Sulu’s little smiles as “I’m gonna blog this.”

Tags:

#Star Trek #TOS