Harry Potter au where Harry didn’t lose being a parsletongue and Albus buys a snake as a pet one year because snakes are cool and one day just walks in on Harry and the snake having a deep conversation
Albus is 17 and loses his virginity in his room and forgets the snake talks to his dad and when Harry gets home the snake is all like OH MY GOSH YOU’D NEVER GUESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS WHAT HAPPENED
Whatever happens, don’t let Harry name the fucking snake! He’d probably name it Basilisk Nagini
Harry takes his family on a trip around South America where he asks around until he finds the descendants of the snake from the zoo. He congratulates the snake family on their grandfather’s return home and they all toast his memory, while Ginny and the kids look on in confusion at Harry hissing with a whole treeful of snakes.
I would read fic about the future of that boa constrictor.
Tags:
#Harry Potter #not being particularly bullshit atm
Brinens and Things - Tumblr Mirror 