Apparently it’s that kind of day.

Because I feel like it, and because the occasional precedents I’ve seen elsewhere seemed to work out well, I am going to answer all of the questions in this ask meme.

How badly will I twist the questions? How many of the questions even make sense? Join us below the cut to find out!

A. If you could get away with one murder in your lifetime without any legal, social, or emotional repercussions, would you kill someone?

Wouldn’t the whole point of killing someone be to cause the repercussions? Or do you mean only the repercussions specifically focused on me?

Even using the generous interpretation, nobody really springs to mind.

B. What is your first thought when you receive a message on Tumblr, are you excited for the idea of someone from potentially the other side of the world wanting to talk to you or fearful that someone will criticize you?

If I’ve said something controversial lately, fearful. If not, slightly excited, but mostly thinking it’s probably a spambot.

C. Have you ever looked down on someone because you thought your religious views were superior?

See question Z. (No.)

D. Would you rather know everything the universe has to offer but in exchange lose all emotions or remain the way you are now?

My first impulse is to do it, then spend the rest of my life recording the information not currently known to Terrans, in descending order of projected usefulness.

Possibly I have been spending too much time around utilitarians. Possibly I have been spending just enough time around utilitarians.

(I’m not sure whether I actually would go with the first impulse, though.)

E. If you could live and be healthy without sleeping or eating/drinking, which would you cut out of your life?

Due to being relatively prone to digestive issues, I have spent more time wishing I didn’t need to eat than I have wishing I didn’t need to sleep. There are also potential complications of being rendered incapable of sleep.

On the other hand, 8 – 9 hours (depending on whether you count dreaming) more consciousness out of every 24 is quite a lot of effective lifespan extension, and it never actually says I would be incapable of sleep at all, let alone incapable of dozing. Given the information provided, I would rather go without sleep.

F. If you could take on the exact body and form of anyone else on Earth, who would it be?

I would need more information on the potential forms available, in order to determine which one would have the best balance of maximum health (both quality and quantity of life) and minimum dysphoria.

Given that I’m currently 21 years old, with basically no dysphoria and no chronic health problems save for severe nearsightedness, it’s very likely that the best body is in fact the one I currently have.

That’s all assuming that the legal issues of getting a new body are magically dealt with, of course. Otherwise it’s even more likely to be best sticking with my current body.

(This question is supposed to be about beauty, isn’t it? I already look plain in a vaguely pleasant manner, what more could I want?)

G. Would you rather burn or freeze to death?

Rumour has it that freezing hurts less, and also has a better chance of being revivable.

H. If it meant it would solve all world hunger, war, disease and bigotry, would you spend the rest of eternity in Hell?

The most effective way of doing that is to kill everyone (solving the first three) and mind-control their immortal souls (solving the last; I assume that since Hell is involved, there are immortal souls in this scenario). That’s not worth going to Hell for.

(Was anyone else surprised that humanity did not go extinct (save for the two people in the eye of the reality storm, of course) during the world-peace part of The Lathe of Heaven?)

I. Was the first crush in your life something you had or something someone had on you?

Presumably something someone else had, though if so I have remained blissfully unaware of it.

J. Could you live without having sex ever (again) in exchange for eternal youth?

See question E above re: complications. It would only take a bit of definition-twisting for this to result in me dying horribly of magically enforced sleep deprivation, leaving an eternally youthful corpse.

(Also, to confirm, “eternally youthful” is still fully grown, right? I don’t want to end up in a baby’s body forever, especially if my mind is adversely affected by having to fit into a baby’s head.)

One needs to define “sex” very precisely for a question like this to be answerable. Like, never mind my fetishes: what if I accidentally do something to fulfil someone else’s? There are all sorts of potential issues here.

If we go with a strict definition, something like “genital intercourse between two or more people, with full knowledge and consent of all parties, for the purpose of inducing sexual pleasure in at least one party”: yes, in a heartbeat. Sounds like a sweet deal. Wasn’t even planning to do that anyway.

K. Have you ever watched a full length pornographic movie?

Nah, videos don’t do it for me.

L. The Beatles or The Rolling Stones?

Neither. I dislike both of them. *dodges thrown tomatoes*

M. If you could have the ability to manipulate matter or energy, which would you choose?

To what extent is that even a meaningful question?

N. What was the worst nightmare you ever had?

Measured in terms of “how long did it take me to calm down afterward”, probably the one with the serial killer.

O. Would you rather spend one year with your one true love just to never see them again or the rest of your life with second best?

Okay, that’s definitely not a meaningful question.

P. All the sequels/remakes/adaptations/rip-offs in movies nowadays, good or bad?

I don’t consider it inherently good or bad, but rather judge on a case-by-case basis.

(Also, I am informed by Shakespeare nerds that this tendency towards sequels/remakes/adaptations/rip-offs is not a new phenomenon.)

Q. Would you rather be dirt poor and emotionally fulfilled in life or be rich beyond imagination and emotionally dissatisfied for life?

This is a very similar question to D, but replacing “think of what I could teach!” with “think of what I could give to charity!”. The same answer applies.

R. Do you have any (secret) feelings of bigotry to any group of people?

I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it may force me to incriminate myself.

(Besides, then they wouldn’t be secret anymore, would they?)

S. Would you rather be the only person in the world that can read minds or have everyone else in the world be able to read minds except for your own?

If I can turn it on and off at will, me. Mostly to keep it from falling into the wrong hands. (I can’t entirely guarantee that I’m not the wrong hands, but giving telepathy to everyone would definitely cause it to fall into some wrong hands.)

T. If everyone in the world would automatically only know one language, which language would you choose?

I seem to recall that English is currently the most widely spoken language, which means that choosing English would minimise the extent and number of horrific mind-alterations performed on people. I’d really rather not have to do it at all, though.

U. If you were old enough and not in a situation where it would be inappropriate, would you sleep with one of your (past) school teachers/professors?

There is no situation in which having sex with your mother is appropriate. I’ve never met any of my other teachers in person, though come to think of it, I don’t actually have to have seen them in order to say I wouldn’t have sex with them. It’s a safe assumption in general.

V. A world without religion, good, bad, neutral?

Impossible, unless you kill everyone (again). Unlike maggots, religions can reproduce via spontaneous generation.

W. The men’s rights movement, legitimate cause or laughable, and why?

Last I heard, there were multiple causes calling themselves “men’s rights”, of varying levels of legitimacy.

X. You can eliminate one of your five senses to substantially strengthen the others, which one and would you do it?

I would need more information to make that decision. Getting rid of smell will normally impair taste: am I magically protected from this? Will my senses be strengthened to the point of painful overstimulation?

(I probably wouldn’t do it, especially since I’m having a hard time seeing how the answer to my second question could be “no”.)

Y. Do looks mean anything to you? Don’t lie, could you fall in love with someone you thought was ugly?

Well, aren’t you pushy.

Current evidence suggests that I cannot fall in love with people I think are ugly. I also cannot fall in love with people I think are pretty.

Z. Can you understand the mindset and logic used by the opposite spiritual opinion? An atheist understanding the belief in a higher power and vice versa.

The only reason I don’t “belie[ve] in a higher power” is because I haven’t encountered any evidence for it. Unlike most people who say that, I am willing to accept subjective spiritual experiences as evidence. I haven’t had any such experiences, and may not be capable of them.

(So, yes.)

Well, I think we’ve all learned something here, and it’s that I have spent too much time reading genie stories.

(Or possibly just enough time reading genie stories.)


Tags:

#Brin talks about herself for no particular reason #(I don’t think I’ve ever done a readmore before) #(I hope it works) #anyone else want to join me in answering all the questions? #so I don’t feel as alone in this? #and also so I can see what your answers are? #meme #oh look an original post

comparativelysuperlative:

theunnumberedsparks:

In the Emperor’s New Grove animals are sentient. Squirrels can talk and so can insects. There’s a scene where a fly gets caught in a web and then cries out for help because it knows it will die. Killed by probably another sentient being for survival.

When you think about this type of relationship going on in the entire world, the true horror might dawn on you. There are millions of sentient creatures with short lifespans and most of them die savagely. They are literally forced by their natures to hunt each other or else they will die. Until society invents a way to feed everyone ethically, reconciliation, cooperation, and peace are impossible. No wonder humans have a legup.

It’s an incredibly horrifying implication.

Wow, that’s terrifying. And there’s only one person who can fix it.

No, not Gandalf. Yzma. Yzma can fix this.

Whatever else she can do, she can turn things into other things without worrying about details like “conservation of mass.” This doesn’t solve all the problems, because it only works within the animal kingdom: Llama potion turns the Emperor into a llama, the same potion turns a potted plant into a llama-shaped potted plant. (Human to octopus still works, so it’s not about composition, but there is some kind of constraint here.)

What she can do is manufacture meat for whatever animals can’t go vegetarian. She has potions to turn things into whales. (Come to think of it, it’s kind of impressive that those have even been discovered.) Pick the largest animal that’s tasty for the carnivores, and mass produce that potion. Use it on recently-dead mammals, or insects if that works. Macabre? Absolutely. It’s transmogrifying the bodies of sentients in order for more people to be able to eat them. But it’s also saving countless lives.

Now we have to get the animals to go along with this. Fortunately, they’re sentient. And Yzma has authority to negotiate as the Emperor’s advisor. Think they’d agree to eat only meat that died of natural causes in exchange for full citizenship rights? Uh, if there even are citizenship rights in a country where the Emperor can tear down your house at will. Still, they’ve clearly got stuff to gain. Maybe everyone agrees not to kill sentient prey in exchange for protection from their own predators, and the people at the top of the food chain go along with it because it’s enforced by a shape-shifting superpowered Royal Guard.

The eventual solution is to use those transforming potions to make everyone biologically capable of vegetarianism. It may take time and research to figure out how to change, say, a jaguar, to make them vegetarian without also giving them an unprecedentedly bad case of dysmorphia, but that’s what the Secret Lab is for. And you can’t tell me this is outside the scope of what transmogrification can do.

Then you get to work on the optional upgrades. Don’t like your body? Try another one! You can be a llama permanently if you want to for some reason, and once everyone accepts that the nonhumans here are sentient it won’t even be weird! Your species would be about as significant as your clothes, and a lot easier to deal with.

And that’s just with animals that currently exist. Wanna be a kraken? Want the eyes of a hawk and the thumbs of a human? Want wings? Our friendly neighborhood alchemist can probably make vials for those eventually. She can likely even isolate the immortality from that one species of jellyfish.

Only problem: Yzma’s evil.
Darn.

I like the way you think.


Tags:

#The Emperor’s New Groove #interesting

theolduvaigorge:

This is how blue eyes get their colour

Blue eyes don’t get their colour from pigment – it’s actually way more fascinating than that.

  • by Fiona MacDonald

Your eyes aren’t blue (or green) because they contain pigmented cells. As Paul Van Slembrouck writes for Medium, their colour is actually structural, and it involves some pretty interesting physics. As he explains, the coloured part of your eye is called the iris, and it’s made up of two layers – the epithelium at the back and the stroma at the front.

The epithelium is only two cells thick and contains black-brown pigments – the dark specks that some people have in their eye is, in fact, the epithelium peaking through. The stroma, in contrast, is made up of colourless collagen fibres. Sometimes the stroma contains a dark pigment called melanin, and sometimes it contains excess collagen deposits. And, fascinatingly, it’s these two factors that control your eye colour.

Brown eyes, for example, contain a high concentration of melanin in their stroma, which absorbs most of the light entering the eye regardless of collagen deposits, giving them their dark colour.

Green eyes don’t have much melanin in them, but they also have no collagen deposits. This means that while some of the light entering them is absorbed by the pigment, the particles in the stroma also scatter light as a result of something called the Tyndall effect, which creates a blue hue (it’s similar to Rayleigh scattering which makes the sky look blue). Combined with the brown melanin, this results in the eyes appearing green” (read more).

(Source: Science Alert)


Tags:

#eyes #biology #the power of science #neat

ursulavernon:

vmagazine:

Skull Armchair by French designer Harold Sangouard, aka Harrow “Built For Comfort And World Domination”

  • exterior structure: polyester resin and fiberglass
  • internal frame: steel
  • cover black cotton velvet
  • black gloss finish
  • each chair is numbered
  • 103lb
  • L 47.6” x W 40” x H 40”

Kevin, no. The velvet will show ALL the cat hair.

Well, that was a disorienting photoset.

I figured it was something small enough to hold in your hand, and then it started turning around and I was like “…wait. Wait that’s a chair. Not a hand-held thing.”

(“Unless it’s a really tiny chair, I suppose, but it wouldn’t seem right to go through all the trouble of making a chair like that and not being able to sit in it.”)


Tags:

#skull #love the decor fandom #’built for comfort and world domination’ is a nice tagline

northeastnature:

What do you do if you’re a harmless, gentle snake and someone scares the pants off you? If you’re an eastern hog-nose (Heterodon platirhinos), you bluff. And when you bluff, you bluff like crazy. You flare your neck like a cobra (spoiler alert: there are no cobras in the Northeast). If that fails, you roll over dramatically and play dead. If someone rights you, you make sure to roll back over so you look properly dead. You also release every bodily fluid you have on hand. Nearby humans may feel compelled to say “What a clever snake!” just because they can tell you’re really trying.


Tags:

#snake #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #(‘you make sure to roll back over so you look *properly* dead’)