they’re always bringing experts or activists on the news to agitate about porn and there’s a standard script for this that’s like “I think sex education is important, I’m not anti-sex, but so much of this porn is violent and misogynistic if not outright illegal, and it’s far too accessible to our children”
I want to see someone finally be brave enough to say that the government should just make its own porn for teenagers that accords with community values, so they don’t have to go to these shady places to get it. I think the government porn would probably be pretty bad but I would be so eager to hear about the process of designing it. there would be so many stakeholders and consultations. in canada it would have to be bilingual
BILINGUAL CANADIAN PORN NOW
how would they do it? just subtitles? or do the actors need to say the french line immediately followed by the english line and vice versa? or will there be a voiceover? will it be published twice, with the second having been dubbed?
Tags:
#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #sexuality and lack thereof #our home and cherished land #politics cw? #this post was queued because my to-reblog list is too long and I didn’t want to dump it on you all at once
In Canada, we’re famous for our bilingualism. Sure, there’s other bilingual countries out there. Some might even be tri- or quadrilingual. We don’t know, and our media doesn’t tell us. All we do know is that when you pick up a cereal box from the shelf, you get to learn what the French name of the cereal is. It’s Cheerios. Couldn’t have guessed that.
All this means that, throughout your life in Anglo Canada, you are constantly getting a subliminal reinforcement of French. One day, you discover that you can actually read a reasonable amount of the microwave installation instructions despite having pulled the wrong manual out of the box. Shortly after that, you begin to feel a curiosity for this mysterious other culture. And by that, I mean you want to go buy a French car.
Unfortunately for me and my fellow Canucks, options for French cars are few and far between. The overwhelming hegemony of the Americans mean that the absolute weirdest stuff we get is made in Romania under contract to Germans using Japanese robots. Why do we not have Citroëns? There is no valid reason, other than the fact that they went nearly bankrupt the last time they tried to sell their cars here. That’s not supposed to discourage you, silly, General Motors has gone bankrupt three or four times while I’ve been writing these sentences!
So, if you’re out there, French automakers, please bring your weird cars to my country. We can go get a steamé and a Pepsi, and we can find out if the interior of your car holds up well to poutine gravy stains. It probably doesn’t, but that’s okay, I’ll still take the depreciated Francomobile and enjoy opulent luxury comfort on my way back to my home province, where the only French we use is to incorrectly pronounce the phrase “croissaint-wich” at the airport Burger King.
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#our home and cherished land #language #storytime #this is exactly what living in Canada is like #the signs at the airport are like ”n’oubliez pas oú est votre voiture!” and you’re like ”okay‚ sure‚ I won’t– wait” #this post was queued because my to-reblog list is too long and I didn’t want to dump it on you all at once
weird how Thanksgiving is an extremely secular and cross-cultural holiday, such that I don’t feel bad wishing happy Thanksgiving to basically anyone who is physically in the US right now– just got off a boat from China? welcome! you’re probably going to eat different food from me on Thanksgiving but you’re probably still going to get the day off and eat lots of food with your family or something! it’s the original American Immigrant Holiday and thus is inclusive to pretty much everyone
… EXCEPT Canadians. they have their own.
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#por que no los dos #our home and cherished land #home of the brave #Thanksgiving #this post was queued because my to-reblog list is too long and I didn’t want to dump it on you all at once
#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #moose #our home and cherished land #this post was queued because my to-reblog list is too long and I didn’t want to dump it on you all at once
“Adult Canadian residents”, give or take, so maybe tens of millions of dollars.
I was going to say “and you have to live somewhere where food prices are low enough to make the math check out, so, like, not Nunavut”, but then I did some checking and…none of the grocery stores in Iqaluit seem to have online catalogues, but there’s a Real Canadian Superstore branch in Whitehorse, Yukon and it claims to be selling Cheez-Its for exactly the same price as the Superstore in Kitchener ($3.39 for one or 2/$5).
(I do kind of wonder if maybe it was too clever for its own good and ignored me asking for Whitehorse data, but OTOH I guess if any food *were* going to be the same price in Yukon it’d be a lightweight non-perishable like crackers. Hmm…okay, a 3L jug of store-brand apple cider is $3.99 in Kitchener and $7 in Whitehorse, so it looks like this is real price data. (Although I was honestly expecting the apple-cider prices in Yukon to be even worse.))
Maybe the main issue is *how many* grocery chains are in your area: the more options you have, the more likely one of them has a good sale on a given week. And since the receipt has to be from a (fairly long, but still) whitelist of specific chains to count, looks like the folks in Iqaluit are out of luck no matter how good a Cheez-It price they get.
I *am* wondering now if Brother is obtaining a larger fraction of his own food than I’d realised. But even if 0% of my food spending were for him (*definitely* not true), that would still only be USD$8.21.
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#reply via reblog #oh look an update #food #fun with loopholes #is the blue I see the same as the blue you see #adventures in human capitalism #our home and cherished land
“Adult Canadian residents”, give or take, so maybe tens of millions of dollars.
I was going to say “and you have to live somewhere where food prices are low enough to make the math check out, so, like, not Nunavut”, but then I did some checking and…none of the grocery stores in Iqaluit seem to have online catalogues, but there’s a Real Canadian Superstore branch in Whitehorse, Yukon and it claims to be selling Cheez-Its for exactly the same price as the Superstore in Kitchener ($3.39 for one or 2/$5).
(I do kind of wonder if maybe it was too clever for its own good and ignored me asking for Whitehorse data, but OTOH I guess if any food *were* going to be the same price in Yukon it’d be a lightweight non-perishable like crackers. Hmm…okay, a 3L jug of store-brand apple cider is $3.99 in Kitchener and $7 in Whitehorse, so it looks like this is real price data. (Although I was honestly expecting the apple-cider prices in Yukon to be even worse.))
Maybe the main issue is *how many* grocery chains are in your area: the more options you have, the more likely one of them has a good sale on a given week. And since the receipt has to be from a (fairly long, but still) whitelist of specific chains to count, looks like the folks in Iqaluit are out of luck no matter how good a Cheez-It price they get.
Tags:
#reply via reblog #food #adventures in human capitalism #fun with loopholes #our home and cherished land #tag rambles #fun fact: I did the math after seeing a discussion of U.S. food stamps recently #and in 2022 we spent USD$6.16/person/day on food + soda #(I normally categorise soda under ”recreational drugs – caffeine” rather than ”groceries” #~~in order to (not-so-)subtly express my disapproval~~ #but it does in fact contain sustenance) #((it’s USD$6.02 without the soda‚ and yes these two figures *do* count restaurant spending)) #apparently this is substantially less than a food-stamp budget #but it requires more ability to exploit-sales-to-maintain-stockpiles than someone living paycheque-to-paycheque would have #some fortnights I spend $350 at the grocery store and others I spend $100: depends on what’s cheap enough to resupply on this week #(and how many loyalty points I had piled up from previous trips) #(I got over $800 of loyalty points last year‚ which I treat as a discount) #I still feel like we have a lot of room for improvement in our food spending #(indeed‚ I’ve *made* improvements since 2022: things are shaping up to be cheaper this year) #((and not entirely because I’ve been getting more food as ~gifts‚ though that is also happening)) #but Vimes Boot Theory is nevertheless a hell of a thing #as are the plans of a sublimated accountant
#our home and cherished land #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #drugs mention #this may sound like an exaggeration but this is exactly what it’s like #(if anything this is an understatement: it doesn’t mention date formats) #you sometimes hear people wonder if you need to be bilingual to live in Canada #and you do‚ but the indispensable second language isn’t French #this post was queued because my to-reblog list is too long and I didn’t want to dump it on you all at once
people talk a lot of shit about americans putting the flag on literally everything, but have you seen canada. these guys might be the most patriotic motherfuckers on the planet
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#I don’t know about everyone else but for me it’s zealousness-of-converts #I dislike putting the American flag on everything because the American flag represents what one runs *away* from #I like putting the Canadian flag on everything because the Canadian flag represents what one runs *towards* #(I have a maple leaf pin that the Canadian government literally gave me as a citizenship gift) #(and I wear it every Canada Day) #our home and cherished land
#1 – 2. I don’t know‚ why can’t you #3 – 5. fast-food restaurants (and also grocery stores) #no you don’t have to pay‚ and it weirds us out when you ask our permission to use the restroom #you *do* have to ask for water because we’re supposed to check that you’re filling your cup with water and not soda #although the probability of getting an employee who doesn’t give a shit about that is fairly high #(many people buy bottled water from us and I look down on them) #(there is a water fountain (with cups!) Right There) #really almost any non-tiny store and some of the tiny ones will have public bathrooms #6. masks are a solution to many of life’s problems #(let’s face it‚ it’s ragweed season‚ the air wasn’t going to be breathable anyway) #(also I do hear vehicle electrification is gaining a good foothold) #(including the buses) #7. I don’t live in cities because they exist in a state of constant sensory overload #good luck re-designing that #no‚ really‚ I wish you luck #(in the cities I’ve visited‚ though‚ the things I listed above were still true) #(is this‚ like‚ an America thing?) #(no that can’t be right‚ the American cities I’ve visited weren’t like this and also this guy’s username is albertvancouver) #(what the hell is going on out in Vancouver) #(maybe move to Kitchener‚ you poor thing) #(you already have right-of-abode there) #(life doesn’t have to be like this) #tag rambles #is the blue I see the same as the blue you see #our home and cherished land #autism #venting cw #this probably deserves some other warning tag but I am not sure what #scrupulosity cw? #illness tw?
Brinens and Things 