Harry Potter

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

cosmictuesdays:

camwyn:

graphicnerdity:

It’s all Harry’s fault. Well, partially. I suppose Voldemort can be saddled with an equal portion of the blame. The point is, the Dursleys were just minding their own business when a horcrux was dumped on their doorstep. For the next decade it proceeded to warp their minds, turning them from your garden variety insufferable human beings into horrible, heartless monsters. The fact that they survived such prolonged horcrux exposure without delving into insanity or abandoning a helpless child only solidifies their place among the pantheon of noble and virtuous heroes in the Harry Potter universe.

*Mic drop*

That… actually does kind of explain an awful lot, dunnit.

Damn, that’s some twisted meta.

…I thought this was going to be a “just say no to Horcruxes” joke.

Tags:

#Harry Potter #meta #…oh my god #I laughed at ‘Weasley children are particularly susceptible’ #and then I just stopped and stared #oh god

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hchlns:

 

universallyemma:

kyraneko:

elidyce:

thatgirlonstage:

fuckyeahdeathlyhallows:

sirlestrange:

#that is a human as a rat as a cup

That was a long 12 years for Wormtail.

Can you imagine how differently their lives would’ve gone if Ron, in trying to transfigure Scabbers, had actually transfigured him back into a human?
Just take a moment to imagine McGonagall’s reaction if Peter Pettigrew had abruptly appeared in her classroom from Ronald Weasley’s rat.
Take a moment.

Or if Ron had fucked it up a little worse and couldn’t get ‘Scabbers’ back and McGonagall had take him to disenchant him and next thing we know there’s a naked Peter Pettigrew sitting on McGonagall’s desk and the kids in that class learn six new swear words, a hex they will never dare to use, and a fear of Minerva McGonagall’s wrath that will be with them until the day they die.

Ten and twenty years later first years are being pulled aside and warned never mess around in Transfiguration seriously the last time a kid mucked something up in that class Professor McGonagall used two semi-legal hexes, took down a Death Eater and sabotaged the rise of the Dark Lord before Potter had time to get his wand out.

What most of Hogwarts learned first on that otherwise-unexceptionable day was that Professor McGonagall could sure scream loud.

Professor Flitwick’s Charms 5th-year Charms class was close enough to catch the full effect, and the door had been left open besides; en masse the students recoiled with shock and a miscast Hiccuping Charm broke one of the windows (out which the entire flock of ravens they were practicing on escaped to the Forbidden Forest where they only had to worry about centaurs, rather than annoying young humans with wands).

Up in the Divination Tower, Sibyl Trelawny preened over her foresight to have warned her students of an unprecedented catastrophe likely to occur before the hour was out.

Read More

Tags:

#Harry Potter #fanfic #oh look an update #I don’t remember whether I reblogged the earlier version of this or not #but anyway here’s a version with a fic attached

Image ~ ~ Brin ~ 1 Comment

hchlns:

 

sirlestrange:

#that is a human as a rat as a cup

 

fuckyeahdeathlyhallows:

That was a long 12 years for Wormtail.

 

thatgirlonstage:

Can you imagine how differently their lives would’ve gone if Ron, in trying to transfigure Scabbers, had actually transfigured him back into a human?
Just take a moment to imagine McGonagall’s reaction if Peter Pettigrew had abruptly appeared in her classroom from Ronald Weasley’s rat.
Take a moment.

 

elidyce:

Or if Ron had fucked it up a little worse and couldn’t get ‘Scabbers’ back and McGonagall had take him to disenchant him and next thing we know there’s a naked Peter Pettigrew sitting on McGonagall’s desk and the kids in that class learn six new swear words, a hex they will never dare to use, and a fear of Minerva McGonagall’s wrath that will be with them until the day they die.

Ten and twenty years later first years are being pulled aside and warned never mess around in Transfiguration seriously the last time a kid mucked something up in that class Professor McGonagall used two semi-legal hexes, took down a Death Eater and sabotaged the rise of the Dark Lord before Potter had time to get his wand out.

Tags:

#Harry Potter

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Facts from the 2014 UK Editions of Harry Potter

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

littlebastardreviews:

  • Before the Hogwarts Express, some young wizards and witches made their way to Hogwarts on broomsticks and in enchanted carriages
  • There are other fractional platforms at King’s Cross station. Try 7 1/2 for a trip to wizard-only villages in Europe. 
  • It took five and a half minutes for the Sorting Hat to decide whether to place Minerva McGonagall in Gryffindor or Ravenclaw
  • Several Hogwarts students have caused mayhem at King’s Cross by dropping suitcases full of newt spleens or biting spellbooks all over the Muggle Station.
  • Peeves the poltergeist caused a three-day evacuation of Hogwarts in 1876 after escaping a trap set for him armed with several dangerous weapons. 
  • The one exception to the general magical aversion to Muggle technology is cars. Even the Ministry of Magic owns a fleet, modified with various useful charms. 
  • Many wizards were unhappy with the invention of the Muggle-like Knight Bus, and refused to use it when it first hit the streets. 
  • Headmasters and headmistresses of Hogwarts can teach their magical portrait to act and behave exactly like themselves. 
  • Sir Cadogan’s most famous encounter was with the Wyvern of Wye, a dragon-like creature, whom he accidentally killed with his broken wand. 
  • Only one non-magical person has ever managed to get as far as the Hogwarts Sorting Hat before being exposed as a Squib. 
  • Of the Eleven wizarding schools in the world, the African school of Uagadou is the only one to select pupils by Dream Messenger, leaving a token in the child’s hand whilst they sleep. 
  • The 1809 Quidditch World Cup final turned into a human versus tree battle when one of the players managed to jinx an entire forest to attack the stadium. 
  • The Hufflepuff ghost, the Fat Friar, was executed after senior churchman became suspicious of his ability to cure the pox by poking peasants with a stick. 
  • Every year St. Mungo’s Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries treats at least one injury caused by homemade Floo powder. 
  • Before she became a teacher at Hogwarts, Minerva McGonagall used to work for the Department of Magical Law Enforcement at the Ministry of Magic. 
  • Part of the process of becoming an Animagus requires you to carry a leaf from a Mandrake in your mouth for an entire month. 
  • A Dark wizard called Raczidian was devoured by maggots that appeared from his wand when he unsuccessfully attempted to cast the Patronus Charm.
  • Any part of a person’s body can be added to the Polyjuice Potion to allow the consumer to take their form, including hair, toenail clippings, dandruff or worse…
  • Remus Lupin’s father, Lyall, was a world-renowned authority on magical creatures like poltergeists and Boggarts. 
  • It took 167 Memory Charms and the largest mass Concelment Charm ever performed in Britain to modify a muggle steam engine and create the Hogwarts Express. 
  • Students from the Russian Wizarding school, Koldovstoretz, play a version of Quidditch where they fly on entire, uprooted trees instead of broomsticks. 

Yes, these are all canon. Thought I’d type it up to have it as a text reference. Enjoyyy. 

#omg, #i’m loving the extra insight into mcgonagall here, #especially picturing her carrying a leaf in her mouth for a whole month, #can you imagine?, #but also, #wtf, #there are only ELEVEN wizarding schools in the whole WORLD?, #that seems… like a low number?, #unless other wizarding communities have different ways of educating their children (cosmic-llin)

That’s what I was thinking, although rather than McGonagall I thought of the Marauders. Like, at least McGonagall was openly training to be an Animagus. Not only did the (non-Lupin) Marauders have to hold leaves in their mouths for a month, they had to do it without anyone noticing. Without being caught pocketing Mandrake leaves (or if they were caught, having to come up with a reasonable-seeming explanation). Without complaining about the inconvenience except to each other, and only if they were sure nobody else was listening.

Also, a moment of silence for the Muggles who lost their memories in the making of the Hogwarts Express. *bows head*

Tags:

#Harry Potter #Potterverse mages are *way* too Memory-Charm-happy

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thelethifoldwitch:

There are, it is known, some truly bizarre wixen names, at least to muggleborn wixes. The family named “Bad faith” for example, and Ollivander is generally agreed to be quite a bizarre name, and that’s not even mentioning “Dumbledore”.

There are nonetheless some, which are strikingly odd. The Bentwhistles of Newcastle for example, and the Liverpool Goatcurls. The Knockturn alley Brownnoses, and the Crumplesnitch Bookie family.

None have quite as brilliant a family origin name as the respectable Greengrocers, the Cabbagewanks. Owners, for generations, of the Magic Neep of Hogsmeade, they had a long, loud and occasionally violent rivalry with the Dogweed grocers and apothecary family. This reached it’s zenith when Dorian Dogweed suggested to the owner of the Magic Neep (then called William Turnip), that their regular orders of winter Ice Cabbages were going to cause them to go bankrupt, and that they really should diversify their stock of cabbages.

Somehow, and no one outside of these two great greengrocing families quite know how, this sparked a verbally vociferous war which lasted for some ninety years. The Dogweed’s already given occasional mockery for their name, but generally understood to be fine, upstanding wixes and offerers of good advice were hardly mocked for this, but the red-headed and red-tempered Turnips were mocked ruthlessly for their “Cabbagewank” as it was called. 

(There were some, of course, who claimed that Dorian Dogweed had been found knocking one out over the Magic Neep’s stock of Ice Cabbages, but this is considered too crass for the official version.)

However the name of Cabbagewank stuck, to such the point that William Turnip’s son, George, put the name as the surname of his son, Benedict, and it has since, firmly stuck.

(At least, some say, he didn’t end up quite so badly off as Priapus Dickson.)

(Image Source)

Tags:

#nsfw? #…is this a Benedict Cumberbatch joke? #I think I just read a story that was one long leadup to a Benedict Cumberbatch joke