anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

apollos-boyfriend:

i appreciate the content warnings and understand their importance but i can’t help but giggle a little bit when i click on a fnaf fic and half the chapters have child death warnings in their notes. sir this is the Child Death Game i think i know what i’m signing up for

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apollos-boyfriend:

*entering the child death and murder fandom* why the fuck is this place so full of child murder

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apollos-boyfriend:

6d25ec7c10a4814eb68a85b291266780ea4eb488

are you in the right headspace to receive information that can possibly hurt you right now.

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apollos-boyfriend:

4fbd2e18d971fa2db7130f3ff23be62c9f129208

w. what the fuck is the incest fandom

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apollos-boyfriend:

ohmygodtheymeantgameofthrones

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apollos-boyfriend:

cf5b9f3156bb46832503f62210f9d46ac43edd86

now are you in the right headspace to receive information that can possibly hurt you right now.

Tags:

#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #Game of Thrones #Five Nights at Freddy’s #(I knew the Game of Thrones one (at least in broad strokes) but not the Five Nights at Freddy’s one) #this probably deserves some warning tag but I am not sure what #child abuse cw? #this post was queued because my to-reblog list is too long and I didn’t want to dump it on you all at once

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

seat-safety-switch:

This is important, and it could save your life: the firefighters say that you should replace your smoke detectors every ten years. A whole-ass decade is a surprising amount of time for any electronic device these days to last, even when legislated to the nines. Although I don’t know that for sure, it probably isn’t this way out of guilt, at least.

Throwing something away after a mere ten years is antithetical to my very way of life. Every single thing has value, even when it might potentially malfunction when it comes time to keep you from dying. Even I will shoplift a new armload of the bastards (albeit wearing my most Home Depot-y shirt as I do so) and install them as need be.

Due to my hobbies and general dislike of throwing things away, I tend to have more risk of fire in my home than most. This results in a large surplus of sorta-good but untrustworthy smoke detectors, which slowly pile up in the corners of my home, unable to be banished at last to the municipal dump, who I am no longer on speaking terms with, ever since they didn’t let me take that old ceiling fan out of the junk pile. The foreman tried to taze me, even. Me, who has thought about paying taxes on at least two occasions this year. Customer service is awful these days.

What do you do with the old smoke detectors, you ask? Unfortunately, modern detectors no longer use exciting radiation sources as their emitter, so you can’t collect several thousand of them and then become the subject of a magazine article about how you got a new kind of cancer while trying to unlock the secrets of nuclear fission (it involves atoms.) That said, a “used-up” device is still an important safety device, but the kind of safety it provides has somewhat shifted. It doesn’t take much of an imagination to get the most basic ones: wheel chocks for when your parking brake (and transmission) don’t work on a hill. Imitation landmines to keep Bobby By-Law off of your property. Something to plug that open sewage pipe in the middle of what used to be the previous owner’s bathroom, so you stop falling in when you get up in the middle of the night to check if the power company has finally cut you off.

I’m sure there are hundreds of other ideas, but I only have like two working smoke detectors, and – due to the intransigence of the aforementioned power company – they’re both currently powered by a gas generator that I have welded onto the trunk of my Plymouth. It takes awhile to pile them up if I can only replace them every ten years. Maybe those eggheads in the government should consider cutting it to five years, give me some real inventory to work with. Hell, I bet if I had enough of these, I could use them as a tazer shield.

Tags:

#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #(”it involves atoms”) #storytime #unreality cw #this probably deserves some other warning tag but I am not sure what #this post was queued because my to-reblog list is too long and I didn’t want to dump it on you all at once

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

jadagul:

This headline is kinda dumb but the subhead is fantastic.

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Tags:

#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #Harry Potter #Shakespeare #this post was queued because my to-reblog list is too long and I didn’t want to dump it on you all at once

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

useful-boy:

Help help help I got a message about something I’m selling so I went to check facebook marketplace to see if any of the stuff I’ve listed there has gotten views yet and look what was on my fucking homepage

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But wait- it gets better

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Tags:

#love the decor fandom #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

wongbal:

Hello and welcome to Deep Space Nine. We are a space station, not a starship, so you’ll be spending a lot of time with all these delightful side characters like: bisexual fashion lizard. hologram of Frank Sinatra. goblins. goblin comes in 3 varieties: bartender, nephew, and idiot. our doctor is a twink, our commander is antifa and the captain talks to the gods sometimes. our policeman is sometimes a liquid and the science lady is part worm. we have many fine storylines, such as: Goblin Does A Crime, Watch The Irishman Suffer, or The Horrors Of War. As you stroll along our promenade enjoying a raktajino or delicious jumja stick, watch out for our nefarious villains: Pope Karen. clones of Jeffrey Combs. and a horny bastard reptile man who seems convinced this is actually his show. we suspect he may be possessed by demons. Have fun!

Deep Space Nine: now with Worf™!

Tags:

#Star Trek #DS9 #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #not wrong #this post was queued because my to-reblog list is too long and I didn’t want to dump it on you all at once

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

thelearnedsoldiertoo:

nonasuch:

i think the funniest possible star trek viewing order might be strictly chronological.

you’d have to start with that Voyager episode where they go to before the Big Bang, then work your way through every other time travel episode, the one with the whales, and First Contact before you even get close to anything approaching a normal viewing order.

at some point you’d have to watch “City on The Edge of Forever” followed by “Little Green Men” followed by “Far Beyond the Stars” which is about the most tonal whiplash you could possibly get from three consecutive episodes of star trek. I think I want to try this now.

I think this might actually kill you so if anyone does this, tell me if it gives you the adult equivalent of shaken baby syndrome.

Tags:

#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #Star Trek #overly literal interpretations #death tw? #this post was queued because my to-reblog list is too long and I didn’t want to dump it on you all at once

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

ashkaztra:

veliseraptor:

airlocksandaviaries:

2 genres of fanfiction:

1) put that guy into situations

2) take that guy OUT of situations for the love of GOD let them REST

#3) dip him in and out like an Oreo in a tall glass of sufferings milk (via @curiosity-killed)

You put the blorbo in, you take the blorbo out, you put the blorbo in and shake him all about.

Tags:

#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #fandom #this post was queued because my to-reblog list is too long and I didn’t want to dump it on you all at once

~ Brin ~ 1 Comment

{{previous post in sequence}}

itsbenedict:

{{ https://va.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_rtjtrijTIF1ro7vxh.mp4 }}

it’s one of those posts that needs to be sung.

lyrics (@syrena-of-the-lake ’s lyrics plus a few verses of my own to fill in the blanks):

It’s nine o’clock on a work night
And to my so-familiar chagrin
There’s a crack-of-dawn shift I’ve been scheduled for
So I guess it’s ‘bout time to turn in
–
But the foam in my mattress ain’t memory
There’s an issue that blocks my repose
‘Cause it’s real hard to sleep when you can’t hear a peep
Over ballads your bed done composed
–
La, la-la, di-di-da
La-la di-di-da da-dum
–
Sing us a song, you’re the pianobed
Both a bed and piano upright
Now you’re trapped in this mattress and melody
While Tumblr all laughs at your plight
–
Now Mozart and Bach, they are friends of mine
And Brahms with his sweet lullaby
But when my bed folds up tight in the dead of the night
I can’t sleep however I try
–
I say “Wolfgang, Johannes and Johann,
I respect all your great symphonies
But I can’t get much sleep with concertos
Being played on my head and my knees”
–
Oh, la, la-la, di-di-da
La-la di-di-da da-dum
–
The doctor says I need eight hours of sleep
This is takin’ those years off my life
And my spine needs a potion from the open-close motions
That’re treating it like a jackknife
–
And the torture, it’s got an accomp’niment
Not enough that it’s breaking my bones
While I’m mashed in the covers, it’s playing a cover
This bed likes the works of Tom Jones
–
[A familiar ditty is sung over the solo.]
–
Sing us a song, you’re the pianobed
Both a bed and piano upright
Now you’re trapped in this mattress and melody
While Tumblr all laughs at your plight
–
They let me sleep in on a Saturday
At least every once in a while
And when it gets out of tune, I can sleep until noon
A slumbering musicophile
–
Then the piano snaps shut, a crescendo
And the chords all resound in my ear
And it’s goodbye bedtime, and hello three-four time
And move over, Beethoven is here.
–
Oh, la, la-la, di-di-da
La-la di-di-da da-dum
–
Play us a song, you’re the pianobed
I’ll be stuck in your mattress all night
So I may as well sing to your melody
While Tumblr all laughs at my plight

[karaoke source]

Tags:

#it got better #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #music #(me: my dude have you considered getting a different bed) #(also me: you know you’re literally listening to this while #procrastinating on taking the plunge on buying a mattress that isn’t just a pile of springs) #(me: …) #((update: I have now purchased the mattress)) #((god I hope six inches of latex foam is enough; my loft bed can’t support more weight than that)) #((I guess if it isn’t I can always go back to the status quo until my brother moves out and #I have enough space for a bed without going three-dimensional)) #((and add more latex foam then)

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

supreme-leader-stoat:

I have a very rough idea in my head that I don’t think I can clearly articulate beyond “And that concludes tonight’s reports on German air forc—WHAT’S THIS? IT’S KING ARTHUR WITH A STEEL CHAIR”

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the-writers-wrench:

IDK what this is about, but I want to know more.

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supreme-leader-stoat:

This isn’t exactly the same idea but it could be but there is more rattling around in here so:

  • The Blitz here manages to qualify as Britain’s Darkest Hour, thus triggering the return of Arthur from the Realm Avalon.
  • He does not speak a lick of modern English. He speaks an unholy mishmash of Brittonic and Late Classical Latin.
  • (Honestly I can see the latter becoming a plot point if they manage to get their hands on a Roman Catholic priest to act as a translator. It wouldn’t be a perfect arrangement, but probably better than anything else.)
  • Truthfully he probably gets mistaken for a madman.
  • Somehow manages to steal a Spitfire out from under the RAF’s nose, proceeds to use it to bring down like half an enemy squadron on his own, then lands in a field in the middle of nowhere.
  • Police and RAF converge on his location on account of the whole “stealing a plane” thing. They eventually overwhelm him with sheer numbers, but he manages to knock out an impressive number of them in the process. I mean, come on. It’s Arthur.

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leseigneurdufeu:

“a catholic priest” i mean yeah sure why not but JRRTOLKIEN himself was alive and a teacher at the time so go big or go home.

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supreme-leader-stoat:

You know what sure why not let’s just make literal real-life JRRT himself a character in this Arthurian return story, he deserves it.

​

chainsawsdreamer:

@seajr DUDE

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Tags:

#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #Arthurian legend #story ideas I will never write #Nazi cw? #this post was queued because my to-reblog list is too long and I didn’t want to dump it on you all at once