Month: October 2019

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

asexualbrittaperry:

you can make nearly any object into a good insult if you put ‘you absolute’ in front of it

example: you absolute coat hanger

 

ggiornojo:

as well u can just add ‘ed’ to any object and it’s sounds like you were really drunk

example: i was absolutely coat hangered last night

 

asexualbrittaperry:

#i was gazeboed mate #i was absolutely baubled

 

animatedamerican:

Meanwhile, “utter” works for the first (e.g., “you utter floorboard”) but somehow “utterly” doesn’t seem to work as well for the second (“I was utterly floorboarded”).

 

nentuaby:

Utterly doesn’t work for drunk because it’s the affix for turning random objects into terms for *shocked*, obviously.

 

animatedamerican:

… huh.  I thought that might just be the similarity to “floored”, and yet “I was utterly coat hangered” does seem to convey something similar.

I have to tell you, I am utterly sandwiched at this discovery.

 

thepioden:

Completely makes the phrase mean “super tired”.

“God, it’s been a long week, I am completely coat-hangered.”

 

derinthemadscientist:

Something is

Something is wrong with our language

 

rooksandravens:

Is it a glitch or a feature?

 

cardboardfacewoman:

Feature

 

maxofs2d:

we don’t have anything like this in French and it offers a range of expressibility that I wish we could properly translate back. it is a feature, i concur

Tags:

#language

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

prokopetz:

prokopetz:

Today’s aesthetic: inventing an elaborate speculative humanoid biology, complete with millions of years of evolutionary history and an in-depth exploration of the social and political implications of the resulting hereditary features, purely to explain why your setting’s elf-equivalents are especially good at performing one particular sex act that just happens to be your kink.

I love that half the responses to this post are like “I have literally never encountered this phenomenon in my life and require examples immediately”, and the other half are treating it as a personal callout.

Tags:

#sexuality and lack thereof #story ideas I will never write

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

sashs:

@e-seal lets start that future discourse!  flying cars are unethical as well as hoverboards! fuck the synthetic food pill industry!  holocloning feeds on young people’s insecurities about their appearances! 

 

e-seal:

wow big surprise you’re focusing on those lofty problems when the failed musk clones left after the explosions are literally biting peoples kneecaps off in downtown new new new jersey as we speak and the cops wont do anything about it since they’re technically jurisdiction of the bezos kingdom

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sashs:

suuure call big picture problems of hypersolarindustrialism and revelocapitalist imperialism “lofty problems”. what do u think fuels the musk clones? the system. what do u think keeps the electroborders of the bezos kingdom blazing? the system. take a step back will u? fuckin futuretankie…

 

e-seal:

can someone translate this into galactic basic please

 

sashs:

god youre dense as Lykmi²…

 

e-seal:

sorryim not familiar with that compound and icant find it on SPACE Google, what is Lykmi² ?

 

sashs:

LYKMI² CYBERBALLS YEAH BABEY!!!!1!!

Tags:

#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #discourse cw? #unreality cw? #the humour of my people #our roads may be golden or broken or lost

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

wingdingsandbrokenstrings:

triptocaines:

nigecha:

whats it with people calling japanese characters from japanese anime who live in japan and speak japanese and have japanese names white

#Seriously if a character is supposed to be white they will be named WHITIE MCWHITERSON #and wear an american flag hoodie shirt pants socks underwear and scream stuff in english every 5 seconds

31fcc0367e970c0de648048521373571a6c0e0d7

Tags:

#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #home of the brave #racism cw?

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

dracobaby:

harry potter starts a youtube channel and all of his videos are called like:  

“STORY TIME: I WAS A TEENAGE CHOSEN ONE”

 “BABYSITTING MY FRIEND’S WEIRD DEAD HORSE (INVISIBLE)” 

“THERE ARE DARK WIZARDS TRYING TO KILL ME BUT ONLY THREE PEOPLE KNOW ABOUT MY HOUSE”

 

dracobaby:

would like to add to this post and say that harry is uploading these videos to standard muggle youtube. people see this kind of scruffy, obviously Fucked Up kid rambling nonsense into his deskptop camera and just think he is really really good at shitposting

 

dracobaby:

Harry, *filming himself with one hand, throwing raw meat at a seemingly empty space with the other*: “So anyways, you guys probably can’t see him through the camera lens but this weird fuck belongs to my best friend Luna who can’t actually take care of him right now because she’s out riding drag- er, um she’s on vacation in Romania so I have to do it. Um, the only reason I can see him is because I watched my close friend get murdered by an evil wizard when I was fourteen which, by the way, was around the same time I started to think I might be gay. Anyone else?”

Teens on tumblr who have no idea he’s being completely serious: “This is the only man alive who truly Gets me.”

 

professorsparklepants:

Hermione finds out about his channel because someone she went to primary school with posts it to Facebook and then she marathons his entire channel overnight to make sure he’s not going to get arrested for breaking the statute of secrecy

 

ayalaatreides:

Hot Take: they can’t arrest him for jackshit because Hermione shows them Muggle memes and demonstrates that the Youtube audience legitimately has no reason to believe he’s anything but an elaborate shitposter.

 

shipdumbass:

Slughorn:let me tell you the story of the kid who survived and killed the dark lord who was in this exact class where i teach him the most important part of potions

Muggleborn:cool cool

Slughorn:Harry Potter

Muggleborn: THE FREAKIN YOUTUBER

Tags:

#Harry Potter #fanfic #story ideas I will never write #I didn’t actually laugh aloud but it still amused me enough to reblog

~ Brin ~ 1 Comment

yudkowsky:

prokopetz:

Bad: Superhero whose secret identity is just staggeringly obvious, but nobody picks up on it for various implausible reasons.

Good: Superhero whose secret identity is just staggeringly obvious, and everybody “knows”, but in spite of countless people’s best efforts nobody can actually prove it.

“Literally everyone knows that Bruce Kent is the Masculine Mongoose,” said the woman sitting across from me in our candlelit dinner. “The superheroes know it. The villains know it. The guy on the street knows it. Uncontacted tribes in the Amazon know it. The Enquirer doesn’t break the mask code when they print your picture because they don’t even bother mentioning who you are. If I need to have conversations with you pretending not to know that Bruce is the ‘Goose, we’re going to be the only two people on the planet pretending that.”

My expectations for this date’s viability were starting to sink. She was saying intelligent things, and saying them with remarkable confidence and self-possession for somebody who thought she was talking to the Masculine Mongoose himself. It was impressing me and more than slightly turning me on. But the conversation had taken a turn I’d been down before, and not a promising one. “I don’t want to get into a relationship under false pretenses,” I said.

“Yeah,” she said. “Like if I slept with you under the impression that you were just an ordinary playboy millionaire, instead of a superhero.” She sipped from her champagne glass, visibly trying not to smile.

“Look,” I said, trying to make my voice as persuasive as I could. “Just like you say, everyone knows that Bruce Kent is the Masculine Mongoose. People have believed that for eight years. And in all that time, nobody has ever managed to prove anything – never mind suggestive evidence, nobody has ever shown it for certain. Shouldn’t that give you pause?”

Keep reading

Tags:

#storytime #superheroes

{{next post in sequence}}

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

lesbianshepard:

i kinda feel bad for oedipus b/c everyone assumes he chose to fuck his mom when in fact he went out of his way to avoid it. he left his hometown and distanced himself from his parents because he was afraid he would somehow get tricked into fucking his mom. everything could have been avoided if his adopted parents told him he was adopted.

 

lesbianshepard:

someone: oedipus was fucked up like who fucks their own mother??? fucking weirdo.

me: it’s not his fault! he didn’t know!

 

lesbianshepard:

also the point of the myth is supposed to show how despite your best efforts no mortal can thwart fate but also? what the fuck? the whole thing was an oracle telling laius that his son was going to murder him and fuck his wife. that shit came out of nowhere. he didn’t offend the gods or anything. they just decided for no reason other than the world is fucked up sometimes.

 

lesbianshepard:

i have been informed that oedipus’ dad, laius, did in fact bring a curse upon himself for kidnapping and raping king pelop’s son chrysippus.

i stand by my stance that it’s still ridiculous to punish oedipus and jocasta for laius’s crimes. also why would the godss curse oedipus for fucking his mom when they tricked him into doing it in the first place? fucked up.

 

the-cheshire-cat-grin:

You’re assuming the gods are ruled by logic and not by zeus nudging poseidon and saying “hey you know what would be so fucking funny”

 

fangirltothefullest:

This is so accurate

 

gaiusthegenius:

did u guys ever watch the BBC drama “Atlantis”
where the main character is a modern guy who accidentally travels back in time to Ancient Greece

and tbh it’s full of him having moments where he realises this is a myth

like this woman comes to him and asks for help because her husband is trying to kill her baby so he helps her smuggle the baby out of the city to be taken in by another family and the other family ask the baby’s name and she says “Oedipus” and the guy is like

oh fuck

and then he meets a girl called Medusa and the whole time is just like
shit shit shit
then she goes missing and they track her to a cave and he is like “guys this is gonna sound weird but does anyone have a mirror”

BEST MOMENT  is he meets a guy who says “Hi I’m Pythagoras” and he blurts out “THE TRIANGLE GUY” and Pythagoras is just HEART EYES like “YES I LOVE TRIANGLES HOW DID YOU KNOW”

Tags:

#mythology #incest cw #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #(Pythagoras) #this probably deserves some other warning tag but I am not sure what