nsfw text?

Berkeley: being other people

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

worldlypositions:

Sometimes I enjoy understanding better what it is like to be other people. You can do this somewhat subtly by talking to people for ages about other topics, and making inferences. Lately I’ve been asking more directly, something like, ‘what about your experience do you think other people would be surprised by?’  But that’s hard to answer, because one doesn’t necessarily have things cached in that way, and many of one’s own idiosyncrasies are probably like water to a fish, and it involves imagining other people imagining you.

Another way to learn about such things is to ask a bunch of people about the details of a common experience. For instance, I have enjoyed:

Going to evensong in Oxford with a bunch of people from the office, then later discussing what we thought about when we got bored: 

  • The very old but humorously hateful notes in the song book
  • The possible friction between the church’s commitment to the poor and their lavish church decor
  • The fact that each of the people in the choir is conscious right now and looking back at us, and later will go and collect their children from school and make dinner in their kitchen and go on living their lives forever
  • The skull decorations

Learning about the YouTube genres that different people are into: 

  • How things work, e.g. how cherry plantations are dried
  • People accidentally dying in extreme sports
  • Marriage proposals
  • Movie trailers
  • Giant pimples being popped
  • Video game reviews
  • Planes crashing
  • Obscure dances

Hearing different people’s views of the monkey waiter sculpture in my house’s foyer 

  • Somehow problematic
  • Creepy in a fun way
  • Never noticed it, but it has a nice face
  • Is a novelty object and therefore disturbs the neutrality of the foyer

One thing I take away from this kind of thing is that different people are paying attention to different things about their environment, and thinking about it in different terms, and getting different kicks out of it.

Many of my friends say they think they are pretty legible, so there would not be much surprising to others about their internal life. My guess is that they are thinking their experience is mostly a sort of standard one, with this window of visual experience, and some accurately represented sounds, and some reasonable thoughts about the things going on in their lives, and so on. But I guess that actually the same visual scene looks in some sense very different to different people, because of things like where their attention goes, what abstractions they use to think about it, and what associations and emotional flavor things have for them.

If you want to play this game with me, what do you think about when you are waiting in the grocery line? What YouTube genres do you come back to? What about your experience do you think other people wouldn’t guess?

>>what do you think about when you are waiting in the grocery line?<<

Some common categories (with example details that may or may not match any particular trip, but are definitely plausible and in-character):

Optimal payment methods. *My* loyalty card has *these* offers on it, and *Mom’s* loyalty card has *those* offers on it, and my credit card only gets 0.5% cashback on everything but hers gets 2% on groceries, and she almost has enough loyalty points to turn in for $10 off but I’m nowhere close…okay, I’m going to get in this line with just the items that have offers on my card, and you get in a different line with everything else. Wait, shit, I still have an unused bread card [link], give me, um…$19.05 of stuff-with-no-loyalty-offers for my batch. Yeah, stuff with price-matching on it is fine, though try not to spread it out among multiple flyers more than necessary.

The things on the tabloid covers.

  • Pitying the people with the divorces and terminal illnesses (their sadness now compounded by having to deal with paparazzi).
  • I…guess it’s nice that Random Celebrity I’ve Barely Heard Of is having a baby? Assuming she wants it?
  • Wondering what it would be like to actually be into any of the things in Cosmo. Wondering if even vanilla-ish heterosexuals are actually into the things in Cosmo. Presumably *some* of them must at least *aspire* to be into that, or it wouldn’t sell. What a strange world they live in. I suppose they’d say the same of me.
  • I can at least understand why people might buy the food magazines. I don’t want to Lose 15 Pounds This Fall (lower fat reserves would just leave me more vulnerable to starvation damage the next time I contract a “”48-hour”“ stomach bug and can barely eat for 11 days), but the pumpkin thingy does look tasty.

The song currently on the radio is ending. God, I hope they don’t play anything triggery next; honestly, who thought it was a good idea to force people to listen to music in order to be in a store, and those earmuffs I tried didn’t help a damn thing with this…oh, okay, it’s just “Call Me Maybe”. I can deal with that, even if part of me is weirded out that it’s not “Thus Spoke Carly Rae” [link].

Why don’t they sell single-serving packets of plain M&Ms at the checkout anymore? They make great emergency-backup chocolate for keeping in my bag (the candy coating keeps them contained, so repeatedly melting and resolidifying doesn’t make them stick to the wrapper), and these days it’s so hard to find a replacement packet after I eat the current one. Makes me overly reluctant to resort to eating it. At least the convenience store has started carrying them now, though their batch is nearly expired and still has a bunch left, so I suspect they’re going to stop carrying them soon.

—

>>What YouTube genres do you come back to?<<

I mostly don’t watch videos, though I’ve been watching some Honest Trailers lately.

I guess questionably-legal music would also count. I tend to treat Youtube as a kind of musical library, borrowing songs in order to decide whether I like them enough to buy, or songs I only need once or twice. I haven’t been trying out music much lately, though, and I was never *all* that big on doing so.

—

>>What about your experience do you think other people wouldn’t guess?<<

I seem to have a more limited emotional range, with fewer buckets. There are things that others report as being entire emotions in themselves, like “frustrated” or “horny”, that for me are sub-types of other things (“angry” and “tired”, respectively). And we *react* differently because of this, too: they tend not to snap at people for coming to their attention too soon after stubbing their toe (the target-less anger latching on to whomever’s available), or oversleep when they’re ovulating (which doesn’t actually help; some well-meaning bit of my brain just gets confused, I think).

Tags:

#reply via reblog #is the blue I see the same as the blue you see #disordered eating #people who can distinguish between their drive for sleep and drive for sex fascinate me #death mention #nsfw text? #food

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

asexualactivities:

tumblr_inline_pgz5hgzbz71r06h2e_540

It’s Asexual Awareness Week and this is your chance to ask your NSFW questions about asexuality.  In particular, this week, we’re welcoming questions from non-asexual people.  So, if you have a burning question about how or why ace people experience sex, masturbation, kink, or some other sexual activity, this is your chance to ask!  (And, as always, ace people are welcome to ask questions or talk about what’s on their mind, as well!)

The ask box is open and we accept anonymous questions!  Step right up, don’t be shy!

(And here’s what Asexual Activities is all about, if you’re interested.)

Tags:

#signal boost #asexuality #nsfw text?

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

maryellencarter:

maryellencarter:

Wanted: disability beta (prosthetics)

Okay, as much as I bitch every time I give up one of my overambitious projects halfway through, I think I’m calling it for Kinktober. I’m still gonna try to write all the stories, but maybe the jinx will stop if I’m not aiming for the time limit. :P I’m legitimately a little worried my Gdocs account is gonna get wiped at this rate, or maybe I’ll just take a misaimed shotgun blast. :P

So! I have one story that’s just about done and ready to post, but it needs one more beta. This is the one I think I mentioned in passing when I was ranting about Highlander fic – I got pissed off about how passive Joe/Methos writers always made Joe in bed, just cause he has prosthetic legs, and it so happens that my current fandom also has a character with prosthetic limbs, so I wrote a fluffy little Wes/Hobbie porn in which Hobbie happens to not be wearing his prosthetics and is also very much an active participant. (He was swimming, there was sunscreen, they got distracted. ^_^)

So, uh, if anybody happens to know anybody who might be willing to look at this and tell me if I did anything clueless or offensive? Preferably someone who actually uses prosthetics, but failing that, somebody actually in the mobility-impaired / physically disabled community.

The fic specifics: ~2400 words, M/M, NC-17 fluffy porn. Fandom knowledge not required; “middle-aged retired space marines in love” should hopefully be pretty self-explanatory. ;-) I can’t actually pay, but I can trade a SPAG beta of up to 10k words if you want? (References available on my beta skills.)

Feel free to signal boost.

Reblogging for the daytime crowd. I’d really like to find someone for this.

Tags:

#signal boost #nsfw text? #death mention

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

brazenautomaton:

ansiblelesbian:

azdoine:

femmenietzsche:

Hmm, time to cause a years-long PR disaster by accidentally starting a rumor that 95% of rationalists have a transformation fetish

It’s true, but only because we’re all trans women

“Accidentally”

anyone who says they don’t have a transformation fetish is just unaware of how many kinds of transformations there are

Tags:

#…honestly that’s a fair point #(I’m sure there are exceptions to every rule and all that but) #I don’t tend to *identify* as a transformation fetishist but I’ve definitely #encountered some transformation porn that made some very good points re: why it should appeal to me #nsfw text? #sexuality and lack thereof

~ Brin ~ 1 Comment

nonomella:

Coraline is a masterfully made film, an amazing piece of art that i would never ever ever show to a child oh my god are you kidding me

 

cthullhu:

Nothing wrong with a good dose of sheer terror at a young age

 

whatthecurtains:

“It was a story, I learned when people began to read it, that children experienced as an adventure, but which gave adults nightmares. It’s the strangest book I’ve written”

-Neil Gaiman on Coraline

 

greenbryn:

@nightlovechild

 

lierdumoa:

This is a legit psychology phenomenon tho like there’s a stop motion version of Alice and Wonderland that adults find viscerally horrifying, but children think is nbd. It’s like in that ‘toy story’ period of development kids are all kind of high key convinced that their stuffed animals lead secret lives when they’re not looking and that they’re sleeping on top of a child-eating monster every night so they see a movie like Coraline and are just like “Ah, yes. A validation of my normal everyday worldview. Same thing happened to me last Tuesday night. I told mommy and she just smiled and nodded.”

 

redgrieve:

Stephen King had this whole spiel i found really interesting about this phenomenon about how kids have like their own culture and their own literally a different way of viewing and interpreting the world with its own rules that’s like secret and removed from adult culture and that you just kinda forget ever existed as you grow up it’s apparently why he writes about kids so much

 

12drakon:

An open-ended puzzle often gives parents math anxiety while their kids just happily play with it, explore, and learn. I’ve seen it so many times in math circles. We warn folks about it.

 

gokuma:

Neil Gaiman also said that the difference in reactions stems from the fact in “Coraline” adults see a child in danger – while children see themselves facing danger and winning

 

rosymamacita:

i never saw so much push back from adults towards YA literature as when middle aged women started reading The Hunger Games. They were horrified that kids would be given such harsh stories, and I kept trying to point out the NECESSITY of confronting these hard issues in a safe fictional environment.

 

jewishdragon:

Also, in an interview, he said that Coraline was partially based on a story his not yet 6 year old daughter would tell him 

SAGAL: No. I mean, for example, your incredibly successful young adult novel “Coraline” is about a young girl in house in which there’s a hole in the wall that leads to a very mysterious and very evil world. So when you were a kid, is that what you imagined?

GAIMAN: When I was a kid, we actually lived in a house that had been divided in two at one point, which meant that one room in our house opened up onto a brick wall. And I was convinced all I had to do was just open it the right way and it wouldn’t be a brick wall. So I’d sidle over to the door and I’d pull it open.

(SOUNDBITE OF LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Right.

GAIMAN: And it was always a brick wall.

SAGAL: Right.

GAIMAN: But it was one of those things that as I grew older, I carried it with me and I thought, I want to send somebody through that door. And when I came to write a story for my daughter Holly, at the time she was a 4 or 5-year-old girl. She’d come home from nursery. She’d seen me writing all day. So she’d come and climb on my lap and dictate stories to me. And it’d always be about small girls named Holly.

SAGAL: Right.

GAIMAN: Who would come home to normally find their mother had been kidnapped by a witch and replaced by evil people who wanted to kill her and she’d have to go off and escape. And I thought, great, what a fun kid.

 

somewhereinmalta:

It’s anxious adults who desperately want to “soften” stories. Kids prefer the real thing: with monsters, bloodthirsty ogres and evil murderous stepmothers; where the littlest brother always wins and all the villains are horrendously punished in the end. The world is threatening to the eyes of a child, so they need a fictional universe where the little people have a fair chance against the big and strong.

 

maryellencarter:

Sometimes. Other times you have small anxious children who really, really don’t want anything upsetting or traumatic in their stories. Those do exist; I was one. The whole thing about “children don’t want soft stories, children want gore and horror and decapitated barbies” may apply to a majority of children, but not all of them. :P

#i also went hoppity-skip of my own volition   #i am not and was not a Real Child   #still kind of sensitive about that   #i was easily frightened and easily traumatized   #and the only people who seem to acknowledge that possibility at all   #are like Think Of The Children conservative activists and helicopter parents   #idk if i have a point here   #i just get a little tetchy about Real Children

—

Oh god, same.

The person right before you in the chain says “The world is threatening to the eyes of a child, so they need a fictional universe where the little people have a fair chance against the big and strong”, and while there’s a important harm *reduction* in that, also very important is “so they need a universe where things *aren’t* threatening for a change”.

This world is one *so* thoroughly threatening that even its *sitcoms* contain shapeshifting monsters that camouflage themselves as normal parts of the environment, and plagues that drive you insane and which can infect you through a phone call. A world where cars have stickers constantly reminding you of the terrible things that can happen to you in them, and every grocery store has a random chance of triggering you, re-rolled every four minutes (and you don’t have enough autonomy to even *attempt* to do anything to counteract it).

Why the fuck *wouldn’t* you want a break from that hellscape?

I did read Coraline as a kid, and I don’t think I found it *especially* horrifying, but “not especially horrifying” is *not* *saying* much at that age.

(I continue to be very glad that I did not read Animorphs.)

—

(Although, re: decapitated Barbies specifically, I *did* play barber-surgeon† with my stuffed animals. This somehow did not stop me from being what I think was the expected level of horrified by those bits of Toy Story; it wasn’t until I was an adult that I realised I was Sid.)

—

There’s *some* ways in which I rolled with it more as a kid (for example, my inclination towards fluff is actually *stronger* now), but I think that’s…sort of a learned-helplessness kind of thing? When horror is everywhere, there’s nothing you can do *but* take it.

(related: the thing where younger!me was into (what I would now recognise as) erotic horror because *that was all there was*; my tastes shifted heavily towards fluffy consentful stuff pretty much as soon as there was fluffy consentful stuff to be had)

—

I wonder if this relates to the assumption between adults that everyone’s masochistic.

—

†I don’t think I ever actually called it that, but I figure that term gives you a good idea of the sort of things involved.

Tags:

#the last time I walked into a grocery store and they started playing That Song #I walked right back out and listened to Florence and the Machine on my smartphone while I waited for them to be done #(and it *still* sucked just not as much) #ten-year-old me did not have that option #reply via reblog #long post #amnesia cw #ageism #nsfw text? #death mention #illness mention #my childhood

Anonymous asked: Do you think the age to be an adult should be lowered from 18?

~ Brin ~ 1 Comment

{{previous post in sequence}}

brin-bellway:

theunitofcaring:

I think we probably shouldn’t primarily be using a discrete legal category of ‘adult’, and should try to transfer each right to people at the point where the coercion made possible by denying them that right is worse than the harm they can do with it. So the voting age should be a lot younger, the driving age probably shouldn’t be, teenagers should be allowed to sign a lease or check into a hotel, you should absolutely never get charged with sex crimes for taking naked pictures of yourself. 

And then in other areas we’re wading into some serious competing access needs. I’m one of those kids who really benefitted from having to interact with zero sexual content until I was 18, and I actually found sex-ed in middle school and high school mildly traumatic because it was giving me information about sex which I did not want to know and wasn’t allowed to opt out of knowing. But sex ed is still really important. I suspect lots of rights-and-access-for-teenagers runs into stuff like that, where some kids genuinely do benefit from being prohibited because they wouldn’t be good at opting out on their own, while other kids really need it. I don’t know exactly how to navigate those. I suspect in general we’re currently erring too far on the paternalistic side.

Here in Ontario, we have a little more progress towards having a staggered adulthood, though I’m sure we have a long ways to go and some of the unlocks might not be in the right places.

That one news story that was all over the place a few years ago, a 17-year-old who tried to refuse cancer treatment and the hospital forced her to take it anyway, is *extra* horrifying if you live in a jurisdiction where the age of medical consent is 16.

(it is a little weird that you can legally consent to *prescription* mind-altering drugs three years before you can consent to *recreational* mind-altering drugs†, though I am aware there exist ethical frameworks in which that makes sense)

I’m not very clear on what exactly legally happens at 17, but I do know my 17th birthday was when our bank started bugging me to take control of the investments my father held on my behalf. (I was, however, allowed to keep my youth bank account until my *19th* birthday (at which point it was transmuted into an adult chequing account).)

(Other banking note: when I first signed up for that youth account at 13, I was immediately offered a debit card, albeit with a pretty low withdrawal limit (a maximum of $100 in purchases and $20 in ATM withdrawals per day, IIRC). I just went and looked at the fine print on youth accounts, and there is no mention of a minimum age for debit cards. It seems doubtful that they would actually give a debit card to, say, a five-year-old if the parents said no, and presumably there’s *some* age before which you need parental permission and after which you don’t. (my parents said yes to the card at 13, so I did not test it then)

The youth account I had at an American bank from age ~6 – 13 did not give me a debit card, though now I wonder if they would have if I had thought to request one and my parents had signed off on it.)

I’d never really thought about it before, but I find that the idea of having a minimum age to check into a hotel feels intuitively nonsensical when I consider it. (I mean, we probably do have one, and I never tried to test it, and maybe there’s some non-obvious reason why it’s a good idea, but) My brain just goes “We serve unattended children at work all the time; why should a hotel clerk respond differently from a fast-food maker? If you’re capable of showing up, communicating your request for purchase, and giving the cashier enough money, and you would be legally allowed to have the thing if somebody else had gifted it to you, then you are old enough to buy the thing.”

P.S. Okay, I went and Googled it and apparently hotel rooms are a little like sex, in that it’s kind of 16 and kind of 18 depending mostly on who you can talk into what. [http://hotelassociation.ca/pdf/Renting%20Hotel%20Rooms%20to%20Minors.pdf] Note, however, that it appears to be *much* harder for a 16-year-old to talk the higher-ups into letting them have a hotel room than into letting them have a sexual partner. A 16-year-old is assumed capable of consenting to sex unless somebody can come up with a good enough reason why not [http://www.cbc.ca/news/politics/faq-age-of-consent-law-canada-1.3851507], and assumed incapable of consenting to a hotel room unless they can come up with a good enough reason why. (and a 14- or even 12-year-old can sometimes be allowed to have sex under the right circumstances, and never allowed to get a hotel room)

(How much you want to bet that nobody involved in deciding what any of the ages in the above paragraph should be directly compared the two acts? made any attempt to ensure we didn’t end up with stricter standards for a smaller deal?)

—

†Alcohol, tobacco, and–soon–marijuana [https://www.ctvnews.ca/politics/pm-trudeau-says-cannabis-will-be-legal-in-canada-on-oct-17-1.3981228] are all at age 19 in Ontario.

P.P.S. Huh, I still got the ask bug. Maybe the first-degree ask needs to have text in it in order to allow further commentary to display in the notes?

Tags:

#Tumblr: a User’s Guide #(and for the above post) #medical abuse mention #nsfw text?

Anonymous asked: Do you think the age to be an adult should be lowered from 18?

~ Brin ~ 1 Comment

theunitofcaring:

I think we probably shouldn’t primarily be using a discrete legal category of ‘adult’, and should try to transfer each right to people at the point where the coercion made possible by denying them that right is worse than the harm they can do with it. So the voting age should be a lot younger, the driving age probably shouldn’t be, teenagers should be allowed to sign a lease or check into a hotel, you should absolutely never get charged with sex crimes for taking naked pictures of yourself. 

And then in other areas we’re wading into some serious competing access needs. I’m one of those kids who really benefitted from having to interact with zero sexual content until I was 18, and I actually found sex-ed in middle school and high school mildly traumatic because it was giving me information about sex which I did not want to know and wasn’t allowed to opt out of knowing. But sex ed is still really important. I suspect lots of rights-and-access-for-teenagers runs into stuff like that, where some kids genuinely do benefit from being prohibited because they wouldn’t be good at opting out on their own, while other kids really need it. I don’t know exactly how to navigate those. I suspect in general we’re currently erring too far on the paternalistic side.

Here in Ontario, we have a little more progress towards having a staggered adulthood, though I’m sure we have a long ways to go and some of the unlocks might not be in the right places.

That one news story that was all over the place a few years ago, a 17-year-old who tried to refuse cancer treatment and the hospital forced her to take it anyway, is *extra* horrifying if you live in a jurisdiction where the age of medical consent is 16.

(it is a little weird that you can legally consent to *prescription* mind-altering drugs three years before you can consent to *recreational* mind-altering drugs†, though I am aware there exist ethical frameworks in which that makes sense)

I’m not very clear on what exactly legally happens at 17, but I do know my 17th birthday was when our bank started bugging me to take control of the investments my father held on my behalf. (I was, however, allowed to keep my youth bank account until my *19th* birthday (at which point it was transmuted into an adult chequing account).)

(Other banking note: when I first signed up for that youth account at 13, I was immediately offered a debit card, albeit with a pretty low withdrawal limit (a maximum of $100 in purchases and $20 in ATM withdrawals per day, IIRC). I just went and looked at the fine print on youth accounts, and there is no mention of a minimum age for debit cards. It seems doubtful that they would actually give a debit card to, say, a five-year-old if the parents said no, and presumably there’s *some* age before which you need parental permission and after which you don’t. (my parents said yes to the card at 13, so I did not test it then)

The youth account I had at an American bank from age ~6 – 13 did not give me a debit card, though now I wonder if they would have if I had thought to request one and my parents had signed off on it.)

I’d never really thought about it before, but I find that the idea of having a minimum age to check into a hotel feels intuitively nonsensical when I consider it. (I mean, we probably do have one, and I never tried to test it, and maybe there’s some non-obvious reason why it’s a good idea, but) My brain just goes “We serve unattended children at work all the time; why should a hotel clerk respond differently from a fast-food maker? If you’re capable of showing up, communicating your request for purchase, and giving the cashier enough money, and you would be legally allowed to have the thing if somebody else had gifted it to you, then you are old enough to buy the thing.”

P.S. Okay, I went and Googled it and apparently hotel rooms are a little like sex, in that it’s kind of 16 and kind of 18 depending mostly on who you can talk into what. [http://hotelassociation.ca/pdf/Renting%20Hotel%20Rooms%20to%20Minors.pdf] Note, however, that it appears to be *much* harder for a 16-year-old to talk the higher-ups into letting them have a hotel room than into letting them have a sexual partner. A 16-year-old is assumed capable of consenting to sex unless somebody can come up with a good enough reason why not [http://www.cbc.ca/news/politics/faq-age-of-consent-law-canada-1.3851507], and assumed incapable of consenting to a hotel room unless they can come up with a good enough reason why. (and a 14- or even 12-year-old can sometimes be allowed to have sex under the right circumstances, and never allowed to get a hotel room)

(How much you want to bet that nobody involved in deciding what any of the ages in the above paragraph should be directly compared the two acts? made any attempt to ensure we didn’t end up with stricter standards for a smaller deal?)

—

†Alcohol, tobacco, and–soon–marijuana [https://www.ctvnews.ca/politics/pm-trudeau-says-cannabis-will-be-legal-in-canada-on-oct-17-1.3981228] are all at age 19 in Ontario.

Tags:

#reblogged from a person who’d reblogged it to avoid the first-degree-ask bug #reply via reblog #our home and cherished land #my childhood #medical abuse mention #nsfw text?

{{next post in sequence}}

~ Brin ~ Leave a comment

sinesalvatorem:

Random TMI Body-Development Stuff

Since being consistently on HRT since the start of the year, I’ve gone from “perky, sensitive nipples on a flat chest” to “actually has breasts and feels slightly awkward walking around with no bra”, and the process seems to be accelerating somewhat.

Also, they hurt ALL THE TIME. Like, even giving people hugs is painful. Luckily, the skill points I recently invested in masochism have been extremely useful here, so this hasn’t been a problem in the slightest. Dull aches are the easiest to mentally reinterpret, so I’ve experienced zero unpleasantness throughout this.

Overall, the sudden boob growth seems good? I’m mostly indifferent to whether I have breasts directly (I’d find it slightly more convenient not to, I think), but I expect it to be good for getting people to read me as female, especially with my top off. (Though I’ve found that breasts have only a small effect on how people read you, and flat chest + eyeliner passes better than prominent falsies + no eyeliner.) Also, like, straight guys like breasts, I’ve been informed.

The other thing having actual flesh-boobs might be useful for is someday being able to nurse children, which would be super convenient. And this seems like it might actually be possible, because for the past few days I’ve actually been lactating any time pressure is placed on my chest. So, proof of concept that lactation is possible.

The only problem is, I seem to be lactating mostly water? Like, y’know how the milk-producing glands are modified sweat glands? I seem to still have roughly-normal sweat glands there instead, so I think I’m producing very dilute sweat, or something.

So, if anyone knows about the biology of transition: What should I expect to happen there? Will they just naturally develop further into actually producing milk, or should I modify my HRT in some way to encourage that? And where might I learn more about this?

Tagging @testblogdontupvote, @lethriloth, and @cptsdcarlosdevil as people who might maybe know more about how trans biology works. But also, like, all contributions appreciated.

Tags:

#signal boost #I personally do not know the answer to this question #(I have never lactated and I produce all my hormones internally) #but maybe some of you know the answer? #nsfw text? #gender

~ Brin ~ 1 Comment

sinesalvatorem:

Question for the mind control fetishist community that is inexplicably over-represented among my followers:

I’ve recently become curious about the theory I’ve heard that asexual people who have kinks often have an autophilic sexuality. That is, their primary sexual interest is tied to them achieving some specific state. They’d have the same range of sexual response as allosexuals, but in response to achieving their preferred state to varyingly precise degrees.

For example, some asexuals are into amputation, or depictions of amputees. They often are more interested in being amputees themselves than in other people who are amputees. Often they’ll enjoy fantasising about being amputees, and further prefer situations where they can pretend to be amputees, and sometimes even desire actual amputation.

And I just remembered that lots of people who follow this blog are part of the mind control kink community! Which always surprises me, because I don’t think I post any mind control related content, and am honestly really sexually boring. But, like, I’ll totally give you guys more shout outs if you can help me learn about this.

My question is: Are asexual mind control fetishists more interested in being mentally controlled/impaired or in controlling others / the mental impairments of other? The autosexuality theory implies that asexuals should overwhelmingly prefer to be controlled/impaired, or be most aroused by the thought of their own altered mental state.

Also, autosexualities are in general correlated with being transgender. Are asexuals in the mind control kink community more likely to be transgender or feel gender dysphoric?

Right now I’m just curious about whether there’s any anecdotal support for this random thought, in case it’s worth doing a survey of. Would anyone be willing to tell me if their personal impression of the community supports or debunks this hypothesis? @acemindbreaker, @brin-bellway, @bannableoffense, @enscenic and anyone else who might have an opinion on this.

First of all, I would like to give the context in which I became aware of this post:

Me: *switches on Wi-Fi on phone, goes to check weather report*

Phone: *buzzes*

Me: Oh, is that an email notification?

Email notification: “sinesalvatorem has mentioned you in a post!

‘Question for the mind control fetishist community that is inexplicably over-represented among my followers…’”

I was amused by this. (I think because I played a critical part in the original surge in such followers.) (Also, it seems to be a popular kink among rat-Tumblr denizens in general.)

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I personally am very much autophilic, but when I query my brain for “asexual or asexual-ish hypno-fetishists” I mostly get back switches. I’m not sure in how many cases their switchinesses were deliberately cultivated, though, or what they started off as if so. (I remember @ellaenchanting talking about how her first hypnosis community was aimed at non-sexual recreational users, and that in that community taking a single role was Not Done: everyone was expected to switch. (I think the idea was something like “how are you supposed to experience the full extent of how neat hypnosis is without seeing it from both sides? and anyway, experience with one side of things will help you when doing the other, because you know more about what it’s like for your partner”, plus an assumption that people weren’t going to be especially attached to one role to start with.))

I’m really not sure how gender tends to go.

Tags:

#reply via reblog #sexuality and lack thereof #nsfw text? #asexuality #gender

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