prokopetz:

One of the distinctive features of Old Norse poetry is the use of kenning: a circumlocutory device in which a straightforward noun is replaced with an allusive phrase.

For example, a ship might be referred to as a “wave’s horse”; a sword, a “wound-serpent”; a shield, “the shame of swords”, and so forth. Sometimes, kennings could be embedded in other kennings – thus, one might have “feeder of war-gulls” = “feeder of ravens” = “warrior”; this is known as a doubled or extended kenning

Though many conventions of English literature can be traced back to Old Norse roots, kenning isn’t much encountered these days – at least, not in most genres. There’s one particular genre where the art of kenning is alive and well, though.

I’m speaking, of course, of erotic fanfic.

Whether you’re referring to a penis as a “porn-truncheon” or a vagina as “squish-pocket” (both examples I’ve seen employed in all apparent seriousness, incidentally), that perfectly fits the form and function of a kenning. Indeed, these examples even adhere to the idiosyncratic grammatical structure of many Old Norse kennings, with the base word being modified by an uninfected noun determinant inserted as a compound prefix.

Euphemisms for sex acts, meanwhile, can be even more baroque, forming multi-level allusions in the manner of doubled/extended kennings. “To ride the baloney pony”, for example, employs the act of riding a horse as an allusion to penetrative sexual intercourse – but the contained phrase “baloney pony” is, itself, a kenning of the simple type, with “pony” as the base word and “baloney” as the determinant, making the whole phrase a doubled kenning.

There are practical reasons for this sort of practice, of course; e.g., complex euphemisms can help sexually explicit works sneak through content filters. Still, it’s kind of fascinating that smutty fanfic has managed to preserve – in virtually unaltered state – a poetic form that’s otherwise been largely extinct in English literature for the better part of a thousand years.


Tags:

#interesting

So No One Ever Thought it Pertinent to Mention There’s a Biopic of Franz Mesmer Starring Alan Rickman?

diaryofasnowflake:

So it turns out as a movie it is pretty problematic and shitty but a good 25% of it is Alan Rickman wearing swishy cloaks trancing (or something like it) ladies who realllllyyyyyy seem to enjoy it.  But he just keeps whining about healing the world and science and stuff.

image

This is for science.

image

And medicine.

image

Not sexy at all.

image

SHE WANTS THE T. (T=trance)

image

Goddamn that little handhold in a hypno context can just be the most intimate thing.

image

Ugh Hans Gruber Snape Mesmer Rickman stop making me love you.

image

Not sexual.  Nope.

image

NOTE This character is pretty much moaning at this point.  Because getting your blindness treated is hawt.

image

Prettttttty sure I do something like this in trance.

image

I guess this could be kinky but she’s already blind.

image

Like I said, there’s a lotta dis.

image

AW YEAH GET IT GURL AND BY “IT” I MEAN YOUR VISION AND THERFORE AN EYEFUL OF SEXY HYPNOTIST ALAN RICKMAN.

image

ALL THE FRENCH ROYAL LADIES WANT THE T.

image

Same.

image

Wait I think I saw a porno like this once.

image

WHAT THE FUCK HE IS MAKING A ROOM FULL OF FRENCH LADIES HAVE AN ORGASM.  THIS MOVIE IS NOT EVEN PRETENDING MESMERISM ISN’T SEXUAL.  WHAT IS GOING ON.  WHY IS THIS MOVIE SHITTY/GREAT?

image

YOU TOO ALAN?

image

GREATEST.

image

MOVIE.

image

SCENE.

image

EVER.

In conclusion: Thank you, Dr. Mesmer.  You hoped your work would cure suffering and disease, and eventually your legacy resulted in freaks like me getting off on it.  And you got a shitty biopic that was kinda hot in a weird way, even by hypnofetishist standards.  Mazel tov.

Also, Alan Rickman can get it.

image

SWAG

You hoped your work would cure suffering and disease, and eventually your legacy resulted in freaks like me getting off on it.

To be fair, this was totally a thing at the time. Consider, for instance, this extended quote regarding the morality of “animal magnetism”. which is basically a bunch of medical commissioners being extremely suspicious of how much resemblance hypnosis bears to sex. I think there might be other choice quotes in that book, too, but that was the easiest one to find.

(The book’s an interesting read, regardless. The late-1700′s conception of hypnosis described in the historical sections is pretty much unrecognisable from a turn-of-the-millennium point of view (my turn-of-the-millennium point of view, anyway), and even the “modern-day” (1890′s) sections are very different.)


Tags:

#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #(‘Hans Gruber Snape Mesmer Rickman’) #reply via reblog #sexuality and lack thereof #though I actually don’t really find mesmerism hot #for pretty much *exactly* the same reasons that contemporaries *did* find it hot #orgasms are so not my style #too stimulating #not restful enough #I suppose this probably counts as #nsfw #oh and also #long post


{{next post in sequence}}

KUEC #176 1:14:00 onwards

mmastertheone:

Kevin: Uh… Red Velvet Oreos.

Ursula: I HAVE to give them a five, and again, as with the Chips Ahoy Root Beer and other things, this is a completely unnatural food made with alchemy. This is not food, this is extremely artificial, but it is EXACTLY what it says it is: it tastes exactly like it. It’s honestly kind of horrifying, but there you are.

Kevin: Really, the fact that it’s completely chemically made is the part that is making me allow it for a five, because those things are fucking delicious. I’d eat that whole bag!

Ursula: It’s like having sex with an android.

Kevin: …What.

Ursula: It’s like having sex with an android! It may be a physically satisfying experience, but it’s not real: there is no human connection…

Kevin: What…?

Ursula: …Fleshlight. Fleshlight’s a better one. It may be a totally sensually accurate experience, but it is still basically unnatural and there’s no love there.

Kevin: …Okay. I… don’t know what to do about that analogy. I mean, I’m tempted to take it out back and shoot it, but I can’t come up with anything better right now. So I’m just going to move on!

Ursula: So, I got yelled at once at a sex toy party! I went with my friend Carlotta, and it was a good friend Laura, who was lovely, and she did, we called them “Fuckerware parties”, where she sold vibrators and whatnot. And the end result was that there was one person in our entire social circle who knew what all of us were into that we would never admit to another soul. And they were basically Tupperware parties, except they were vibrators and whatnot. And she was very honest, I would go be like, “That thing looks interesting”, and she would be like, “Yeah, they’ll fall apart after one use, don’t bother.” …But she did yell at me once. Or rather, she gave me a very stern look. And that was when Adam and Eve (I think it was Adam and Eve who was doing it at the time) had just perfected what amounted to a fake skin texture.

Kevin: Yep.

Ursula: And they were selling dildos and vibrators in the fake skin texture (and this is why we put the adult content warning on this show). And they handing them around, and it FELT like a penis! It had skin, like a penis! This was very similar, but there was something wrong with it. And it was the Uncanny Valley of texture. It was like, it was almost perfect but it failed in some aspect and that failure made it infinitely more creepy than if it had just been, like, hard plastic. So I’m sitting there, next to I believe Carlotta, as we’re staring… Maybe it was Mur? I don’t remember, anyway, someone was with me, and we’re staring at this at this sex toy. And suddenly it hit me: it was room temperature. It wasn’t hot!

Kevin: Hahaha.

Ursula: And because I have NO tact filters, whatsoever…

Kevin: None! You should see the prep before sending her out to do a school presentation. “Don’t say fuck, don’t say fuck, don’t say fuck!”

Ursula: Yes, I spend five minutes in the car going, “Don’t say fuck, don’t say fuck, don’t say fuck!” Anyway, so… I burst out, in… Perhaps more loudly than I should have… “Oh my God, it’s cold! It’s perfect for all your necrophilia fantasies!” …And I got such a Look. I don’t happen to HAVE necrophilia fantasies, which is probably why it was creeping me the hell out. But the point is, if you make something that is absolutely 100% texturally perfect but wrong, it’s wronger than if it just wasn’t perfect. So what I am getting at, is that Red Velvet Oreos are like fucking a fake corpse. …Moving on.

Kevin: ……. I got nothin’.


Tags:

#nsfw #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #I’m quite a bit behind so I haven’t actually listened to this episode yet #but #that’s it that’s the show #(except *sometimes* there’s less sex) #(but yeah this is the show) #Kevin and Ursula Eat Cheap #highly recommended

{{previous post in sequence}}


autumnone:

Now that I look at it, it seems such a tiny thing. Without the broader context, the other straws on the camel’s back, it wouldn’t even be noticeable. It almost still wasn’t noticeable.

And yet…and yet there’s that word. “Stimulating”. Sex ought to be stimulating.

It’s a reminder of everything I hate about the kind of sex-positive sex-ed that’s standard in this subculture. I feel bad about hating it. I shouldn’t hate it. It’s the greatest good for the greatest number.

And yet.

And yet I’m sick of being excluded at every turn. I resent the way the kind of sex-ed epitomised by (though by no means exclusive to) Scarleteen stunted my sexual self-understanding, fed me information and advice consisting mostly of stuff that didn’t apply to me (sometimes the exact opposite of which applied to me) and told me it applied to everyone. I hate knowing that they didn’t even do anything wrong, because I’m such a fucking snowflake that I don’t deserve to expect anyone to ever acknowledge my existence.

(It isn’t my sexuality itself that I have a problem with. I like who I am. It’s the way it interacts with who everyone else is that gets to me.)

(Sexual pleasure is not a stimulant. It is a sedative. If I find a sexual act stimulating, that’s a sure sign that something has gone wrong and I need to change course.)

(addendum here)


Tags:

#sexuality and lack thereof #rants #TMI


{{next post in sequence}}