A character that only ever describes themselves as half-human. They never clarify on what the other half is, even when pressed, and gets insulted that it isn’t already obvious to the other pcs.
Bonus Points: The other half is also human
Tags:
#fun with loopholes #story ideas I will never write #I didn’t actually laugh aloud but it still amused me enough to reblog
Yea
same
load up the playlist and spend the days writing and…praying
Let’s see…. 6 months of quiet and beautiful scenery to earn more money than anyone in the history of my family has ever seen?
Gee…
is food delivered? do I have access to my meds? can I bring friends? is there cell phone service in emergencies (eg I fall off a scenic cliff)? are there any social opportunities in meatspace or am I just in solitary for six months? what sort of library does the house have? can I leave to go shopping, or do I have to order shit like shampoo and craft supplies delivered too? are my living expenses coming out of the million dollars, who’s paying for them?
*always gets tied up in the logistics of that sort of thing* (also people go literally crazy without human contact for extended periods)
Everything JT said (except I’m not on meds). Additionally, you said no internet and TV. Does that mean I can have a computer as long as it has no internet access? If so, how much preparation time do I have to stock this computer with entertainment supplies? (Can I use external hard drives for more space?) Does non-streaming video count as TV? If videos still count as TV even when locally stored, is that all videos, or just videos that have also aired on television networks? (I’m pretty okay with no video at all for six months, but I’m asking anyway on principle.)
And JT, why limit cell phone service to emergencies? Limit data service to emergencies, sure, but technically nobody said anything about not being able to call people. (I’m less sure about texting, since as we learned recently texting is, for most practical purposes, the same thing as email.)
Also, 1 million what?
Well, I was figuring non-emergency phone service would probably be landline, in keeping with the last-century feel of the challenge. There’d have to be something of the sort if we were supposed to stay in or near the house and couldn’t use the internet to order food/shampoo/etc. (If we had a car and were allowed to go into town for shopping, social meetups, etc, a phone might be less necessary, although since I’m always googling the hours of places, a phone and up-to-date phone book would probably still be needed to *set up* meetups, shopping, etc.)
And yeah, 1 million what? If it was buttons, rupees, or pieces of landscaping gravel, it might not be nearly as valuable as it sounds if we assume dollars; if it was British pounds, gold ingots, or tons of weapons-grade uranium, then assuming the ability to convert it to a usable local currency, it could be considerably more valuable.
A computer with no internet access would probably be allowed – at least, I bet a lot of the people talking about writing are thinking in those terms (I sure as hell ain’t writing longhand for six months) – and would be hella useful for writing, or indeed transcribing if I downloaded all current episodes of the podcast ahead of time; my guess would be that all video counts as “TV” and is therefore disallowed.
It’d be more work than sucking a dick for a billion dollars or getting shot in the leg for ten million, apropos of other similar “challenges”, but if living expenses are paid it could be a nice change. ^_^
OBVIOUSLY YOU’LL BE REWARDED ONE MILLION INTERNETS AS YOU’VE BEEN DEPRIVED OF THE INTERNETS WHILE IN THERE.
Tags:
#(May 2016) #conversational aglets #fun with loopholes #(stumbled across this one today)
No | rather not | I dunno | I guess | Sure | Yes | FUCK yes | Oh god you don’t even know
On the one hand, unagingness is very good and worth grabbing. On the other hand, I like having an older-than-preteen body, both for personal “I enjoy the results of estrogen-puberty and would rather have a body which lets me have them rather than not” reasons and for social “being seen as a kid by people who don’t know me would lead to assorted interpersonal difficulties” reasons. Ultimately, though, the unagingness consideration is a Very Big Deal and wins out over the downsides, and so while it’s not my favorite choice within the space of possible unaging bodies it’s pretty clearly worth it relative to my current baseline (which is how I’ve been rating these).
Loophole hacking, maybe? They didn’t say pre-*adolescent*, they said pre-*teen*.
Me aged 12 years and 364 days is a *little* less physically developed than me aged 25, but close enough to be believable as an adult: most of the difference between 13 and 25 is experience, and I assume you’re keeping the ability to gain experience (unagingness wouldn’t be any fun if it gave you anterograde amnesia). You might not pass for adult *at first glance*, but people routinely mistake me for 17 as it is, and I doubt being physically reverted to 13-less-one-day would make it that much worse.
(And it does occasionally have its advantages: one time–it was the day after my birthday, I think I was either 21 or 22–I was in a grocery store and the attached bank had a guy trying to talk passersby into signing up. He started trying to talk to me, but when I turned around and looked at him, my face pinged to him as “too young to sign legal contracts” and he stopped.)
((While seeing whether I could look up which year it was, I found another relevant quote in my diary (age 21): “She tried to take only the parents’ cards†, reading me as underage. (Most of the museum cashiers did. I’m not sure how I feel about that.)”))
—
†Note from present-me: the cards were a citizenship gift from the Canadian government, granting free museum access for one year. Only adults get cards: children merely accompany their parents.
Tags:
#reply via reblog #aging cw #fun with loopholes #morphological freedom ask meme #amnesia cw #our home and cherished land
actually when I was in 8th grade and obsessed with twilight my master plan as a twilight vampire was to sit around in famous shipwrecks like the super deep ones where they can only send robots with cameras from their submarines and when they sent one down i’d be sitting there, pretending to drink out of an old tea cup you know for the drama of it all and the guys in the submarine would know what they saw and that it was real footage but who else would believe them? no one important.
but it didn’t stop there. at the next party they threw to celebrate one of their latest finds, some museum-y banquet idk I was 13, I was going to show up. I was going to show up and make eye contact with them one at a time from across the room and they were going to lose their goddamn minds and then before the volturi could catch wind i was gonna be back in the ocean. how could they find me?
the drama. the theatrics. i can’t believe i didn’t realize i was gay right then but that’s another story, also involving vampires,
hate to burst your fantasy, but
1) vampires don’t show up in film
2) vampires can’t cross moving water much less sit at the bottom of the ocean
you’ve got me a in a difficult position here because on the one hand, this post is specifically about vampire lore in Twilight, so you’re wrong, but on the other hand, saying “you clearly didn’t read twilight” doesn’t exactly make you look like the bad guy here
You wanna get killed by the Vulturi? This how how you get killed by the Vulturi.
what’s the guy in the volturi who tracks other vampires gonna say when they’re looking for me???? “yeah I have visual on her….she’s…underwater. really deep there aren’t even any fish around her. yep, she’s definitely somewhere in the ocean.”
like cool get started see ya never
Tags:
#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #vampires #Twilight #fun with loopholes
i fucking love alan turing
(from “the secret life of bletchley park” by sinclair mckay)
Tags:
#history #World War II #I didn’t actually laugh aloud but it still amused me enough to reblog #fun with loopholes #(…does that loophole actually work though?) #(just because you don’t *understand* something doesn’t mean it’s not *true*)
“Ah, yes, the tropical rainforest planet.”
“By ‘tropical rainforest planet’, do you mean it’s got rainforest around the equator, or that it’s entirely covered in rainforest?“
“The whole thing is rainforest, yes.”
“Huh. Wild! Still, calling it all ‘tropical rainforest’ is misleading, as the tropics refer to the areas around a planet’s equator.”
“Oh, the jungle planet doesn’t have an equator.”
“It—what? Of course it does. It has to! All spheroid planets capable of sustaining life have equators, it just refers to the division between the poles along the axis of rotation.”
“No, no, you see, I know that. But the jungle planet doesn’t have a single axis of rotation. Instead, it wriggles around so that every part of it is equally heated.”
“That sounds fake, but I don’t know enough about planets to tell you how stupid that is.”
“The inhabitants call it Sous-vide.”
fun fact: the tropics are the area around the equator, but how much area around the equator depends on the planet’s axial tilt. a planet with a 90° axial tilt would be entirely tropical. in our solar system, Uranus is 99% tropics by surface
Tags:
#anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #story ideas I will never write #overly literal interpretations #fun with loopholes
God said to Adam: you may eat of any other tree in the garden, but you must not eat the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, for when you eat of it you will die. And Adam fashioned an axe, and he cut down the Tree of Knowledge. And God asked “Adam, what have you done?” And Adam said “I refuse to be complicit in my own temptation.”
God said to Adam: you may eat of any other tree in the garden, but you must not eat the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, for when you eat of it you will die. So Adam picked the fruit of the tree and planted it in the ground. A few years later, another Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil grew from the place he had planted it, and Adam ate the fruit of that one.
God said to Adam: you may eat of any other tree in the garden, but you must not eat the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, for when you eat of it you will die. But the serpent told him this was lies, and that if he ate from the Tree of Knowledge he would not die, but would become as God. “How do you know?” asked Adam. “Have you eaten the fruit?” “Yes,” said the serpent. “I have tasted of it, yet I did not die.” So Adam ate the serpent.
God said to Adam: you may eat of any other tree in the garden, but you must not eat the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, for when you eat of it you will die. So Adam picked the leaves of the Tree and made a delicious Good And Evil Salad.
God said to Adam: you may eat of any other tree in the garden, but you must not eat the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, for when you eat of it you will die. Adam desired to taste of the fruit, and he decided that if he was going to get in trouble for breaking a commandment he might as well go all out. So he waited until the tree was heavy with fruits, then binged on all of them in one sitting. And the Lord definitely cast him out of Eden – but on the plus side, thousands of years later his descendants had excellent moral compasses and always knew the right thing to do in any situation.
God said to Adam: you may eat of any other tree in the garden, but you must not eat the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, for when you eat of it you will die. And Adam obeyed the commandment, and instead he ate of the Tree of Knowledge of Cool and Uncool. Then he saw his own nakedness, and found it unfashionable, so he made a snazzy jacket out of leaves and bark. And the Lord saw the jacket, and said “Adam, have you eaten from the Tree of Knowledge of Cool and Uncool?” And Adam said “You’re not my dad, you can’t tell me what to do.” And the Lord sent him forth from the garden, but Adam just said “Laaaaaaaaaame”.
Tags:
#fun with loopholes #death mention
My brother just sent me this on snapchat I can’t fucking stop laughing this is so stupid I hate him
Boredom remains a national problem in Canada.
Tags:
#I feel like this fits the spirit of #fun with loopholes
Brinens and Things - Tumblr Mirror 