So there’s this company in the UK, right. They brand themselves on producing fancy free range eggs and as part of that they have breed information written on the carton.
I did some snooping and found that every miracle news story of a supermarket egg hatching in the UK traced back to duck eggs, specifically the Braddock White duck eggs produced by this one company for the supermarket Waitrose.
And one day my mum brings them home and says “I bought these to eat but aren’t they the ones that hatch?”
And it’s spring and I’m hatching a ton this year so in they went.
On candling we had three fertile eggs! That’s a fertility of 50% – the same as shipped eggs from a breeder!
Hatch day comes and we get 2 ducklings, Curie and Becquerel. Sadly, Curie contracts duck septicaemia from an infected navel and doesn’t make it, but Becquerel is a healthy bird and growing like a weed.
I had put 4 breeder eggs in a week after them in case just one hatched, so Becque now has two Khaki Campbell cross friends called Tsuki and Hoshi so she isn’t lonely.
And as of today’s 7am Quacking – Becque is a female! Which means she’s capable of laying eggs and therefore I have pirated a duck.
You wouldn’t download a duck
Tags:
#food #ducks #adorable #death tw? #fun with loopholes #anything that makes me laugh this much deserves a reblog #(I did laugh at the ”pirated a duck” line‚ but‚ like‚ they *did* pay for the egg) #(I guess it’s more like DRM stripping)
“It was all our own fault,” Marilla said resignedly.
-Anne of Green Gables
‘And Jane and Michael screamed at him as he passed.’
– Mary Poppins
“Mario stopped and looked in the shop window.”
—The Cricket in Times Square
“Nevertheless, young Woolsthorpe persevered in his studies of natural philosophy in the way a gentleman should, by digging into any suspicious-looking burial mounds he could find in the neighbourhood, filling up his lizard press with as many rare species as he could collect, and drying samples of any flowers he could find before they became extinct.”
–Snuff, by Terry Pratchett
…you know, if you look at it a certain way that’s actually pretty accurate.
“Would you rather X boy or Y boy?”
“What? Oh, don’t mind me, I’m just here studying the mating habits of Homo sapiens. Seeing as how sapience complicates everything it touches, humans’ sex lives are even more interesting than those of ducks. Speaking of ducks, did you know duck penises…”
(I haven’t actually had this exchange, but I could. The beginning question is one I have heard, just not directed at me. Turns out in that group it was strictly volunteers taking part in the highly-euphemistic sex discussions.)
(I did actually read about duck genitalia. You can read it if you want. Beware of animal rape. The TMI should be obvious.)
Brinens and Things 